Month: August 2014

#Perfectionism: Polishing Doorknobs #sytycd #realitytv

I have known people who are so meticulous about cleaning that they even will polish a doorknob or two, just to give the room an added shimmer. I can’t imagine having enough time in a day or the care to do such a meaningless action. Yet some, especially when trying to sell a home or get a room ready for a big party, will go to the nth degree to give their place that perfect look. I’m more apt to be the dude who will put something front and center that is absolutely imperfect—like a chipped vase—because I don’t think anyone feels comfortable in perfection.

I watched the performance finale of “So You Think You Can Dance,” last night. The producers showcased each of the four finalists with a five-minute autobiographical segment of their journeys to get to the finals. One young man who has had nothing but praise the entire season shared that his journey was more difficult in the process, because he has had to live up to perfection every show. From the first audition, I kept thinking Ricky would be the winner. However, now that I had watched the last dances, I’m beginning to wonder if America would settle on an underdog instead of the frontrunner.

If you watch any reality television that includes some kind of talent contest, America tends to always pick a person who has been less than perfect, rather than spot on. Have you ever thought about why the guy or girl who cracked or sang flat when singing her last song usually wins over the person who was perfect?

Who can relate to perfection? If you have had a narcissistic guardian or teacher in your past, you may think that perfection is the goal. But, when the time comes down to choosing the person who most deserves to win, we will all pick a contestant who has grown in the contest and who is less than perfect, because we can relate. You’ve heard the Salvador Dali quote, “Have no fear of perfection; you’ll never reach it!” That’s you! That’s me!

When you settle in to the idea that perfection isn’t the goal in your life, you may consider a more attainable goal: PEACE! Joy! Truth! Passion! All of these choices require authenticity, but not perfection.

When I sit down to meditate, I don’t have a goal in mind. I simply desire for quiet and to download some of God’s awesome insight into my mind. When I seek for Joy, I simply reach into my heart for what would make me happy in any particular moment. When I search for truth, I let the universe reveal it in the metaphors of life. And, finally, when I live for passion, I don’t start off aggressive and teeming with desire; I begin a slow course in discovery of something or someone new. In this mysterious unveiling, passion comes without my help.

So, today, choose to polish something worth shining. Begin to take off those cobwebs on your social and spiritual life. Chip off the corrosion that keeps the door hinges to your happiness and joy from opening wide to your bountiful and delicious life!

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Book Cover - Full Size

The name of this book is the brand for all of my books, because perfection is never the goal. We all have a unique and wonderful way to get to our passion and joy. My goal is to help you find ways to clear the path so you can see your awesome future. Try this book and its 365 Daily Discoveries! Buy it Now!

[Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books helps people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE. Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle: ]

 

 

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Dealing with #Frustration

Day-to-day life is often rife with frustrating decisions and conundrums aplenty, as the world around happens. Instead of getting caught up in the mire, we must push our way through the crowded mass of energy and people to even get through our to-do lists.

For example, today, I was supposed to get up at 7 a.m. with my sister; she was to follow me to the automotive shop to get my car fixed; then take me home with her. Together, we were going to deliver my mother to her doctor’s appointment at 11 a.m. and then pick up my car, hopefully, with the brake light off. As it turned out, my sister became very ill last night. She was up all night vomiting. I got to the automotive shop by myself without my valet and my wallet, and, though I had enough work on my computer and a book to keep me occupied until they fixed my car, the waiting room had no air conditioning—in Florida!

I told the serviceman that I would come back another day. I called my mother and told her that I would take her to the doctor’s appointment. Suddenly, my day looks very different than what I had planned. Did I get frustrated? For a moment, I felt angst. But, I decided that I was here on this earth to be a player and to learn, not to sit out on a bench. I wondered what would happen if I would just let Spirit have Its way with my life and with my morning. Suddenly, my heart felt at peace as I drove home.

Last week, I felt on top of the world. I had been emancipated from my old life, negativity in my past, and I looked forward to the new and exciting life Spirit prepared for me.  This week, I have been stymied at almost every move. I feel as though I should stay put and be quiet, as the world doesn’t appear as safe and inviting as it did last week. I’m not sure why, but I must listen to my heart.

Last week, I felt almost as if I had a daredevil mentality. Perhaps, spirit is trying to tell me that I need to reel in my energy a bit and spend more time deliberating my steps, before I move forward. I can hear that, if this is the case. Objectively, I did not move to a new city and leave my old life to be disobedient to the same heart that led me here. I must gather my energy and stay centered in this time of stress.

I have clients who tell me that stress draws them to smoking, drinking, and other insatiable habits. My advice is to always look inward for peace, because the “kingdom of God is within.” I believe, and will continue to believe until otherwise led, that God and the world deals everyone stressful situations because the world is made up of chaos, not because we have been singled out for bad to happen. Occasionally, though,  our own strength must be tested, for our own sakes. God already knows how much we can bear. Our souls, however, don’t understand the depth of our spiritual knowhow. If we know we can endure difficult situations without crutches, we are more apt to stand firm in our peace, realizing the roots of the tree stand on solid ground. No matter how hard the world shakes us, we may bend, we may bow and shed some leaves, but we will not fall to the pressure.

So, this week, when stress comes calling—and it often will—instead of depending on a crutch or a habit, try to go inward to invite Spirit to lead you to peace.

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Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior Cover

This book is filled with daily affirmations and discoveries, much like this blog, helping you to seek for inner peace and your own unique form of spirituality. Buy the Book Here!

[Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books helps people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE. Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle: ]

 

 

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Plant the Seed, Water It with Love, and Let God Do the Rest

Yesterday, I got caught up in expectation and results. I woke up, sat on the end of my almost new bed, and the frame broke, probably from the bad job of rebuilding it by the movers. I took my dog Coco to PetsMart. He stepped on the emergency brake in the car. Immediately, my brake light went on and wouldn’t go off. I ate popcorn and chipped my back tooth, leaving a very rough edge on my tongue. And a dude that I really liked and thought liked me back, texted me first thing that morning and said that someone from his past came back into his life, so he couldn’t see me anymore. The entire day, even the pouring down rain, cast a negative hue on my outlook of life.

I’m learning quicker, now, to seek the help of friends and therapists in my life when I need a swift kick in the butt or a nudge of encouragement. I wasn’t sure exactly what was wrong, but I did reach out to two friends. One of them called me back on his first break and listened to my moaning, before he shared his insight. He said, “Bo, you can only plant your seed and water it a bit; then, God has to do the rest. You cannot be responsible for all of what happens around you. Only God can!”

This was brilliant advice. Added to that, I have been reading a book called The Art of Uncertainty by Dennis Merritt Jones. In the book, Jones says that the first step of learning to love life in this “Earth School” is to begin to enjoy the uncertainty of the future. This, of course, kind of stuck in my craw, because I like to know or to plan my future, as most of us do. But, I realized, that the lesson of this book is much the same as the lesson of the day. If I could have controlled all of my life, I probably wouldn’t be sitting in the place I am now—in a new city, in a new apartment, by the ocean, and living my authentic dream.

When we control life, it seems we live in the same circular pattern, moving round and round in the space that is comfortable, never venturing off into the unknown. What pushes us into paths untraveled, however, are the subtle nudges—or sometimes huge pushes—of Spirit in ways unfathomable.

Today, try to let go of the results of whatever you’ve set out to do. You have only one duty: do what you intend! After that, leave the rest to God. You don’t know if that audition is about meeting someone wonderful or actually getting the show. You don’t know if that job interview is about someone else learning a lesson. You simply know your part in this Earth’s School. That’s it. All the rest is a mystery. What you need to know, will be revealed!

Dennis Merritt Jones also says in his book that living life with uncertainty is similar to reading a page-turner novel, never knowing what will happen next. Even at the end of a great page-turner, you should be surprised with an unexpected result. If you enjoy a good read like this or a movie that keeps you on the edge of your seat, then try learning to live life in this same way, could turn out to be an exciting adventure!

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Fatal Virtues Cover

This is a page-turning novel that will keep you guessing until the end, about a female mafia in Pittsburgh and their black sheep District Attorney niece who seeks to get to the bottom of rumors about her family and their famous restaurant Trattoria.

[Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books helps people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE. Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle: ]

 

 

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