Month: April 2015

Polishing the Silver—Surrogacy #anxiety #change #livingintheNOW

Every six months, my grandmother would take out a beautifully crafted, wooden box that contained her much prized silver. I actually don’t ever remember using it to eat, but I do recall helping her polish every last piece of a service for twelve and all of its accoutrements. The silver would be almost completely black by the time we opened the drawer. Each piece would take five to ten minutes to polish with a special solution she created with hot water, salt, and baking soda.

As we polished, we would talk about her good ole days. I loved my grandma so much, her smile, her touch, and especially her laugh. She always smelled of Jergens lotion and felt cushy to the touch. She put lotion on her hands a lot, but she would always put on enough to wrap her hands around my tiny ones and share. I always felt as if I was the only one who was important to her, though she had eighteen grandchildren.

The special love of someone loving and nurturing as a child is so important for anyone of us who was abused. Even still, we need this as adults, when we are triggered from something that brings up anxiousness or fear of losing love. I remember the huge heart that coddled me and protected me as much as she could from the pain of two parents who just couldn’t make it work and all of the effects of a dismantled childhood. But, sometimes memories are not enough. We need someone with whom to polish the silver.

Surrogacy is a great part of life. When you can’t get what you need from your family or the people closest to you, you must take the matters into your own hands and find someone who is willing to provide what you need in a surrogate way. For instance, a marriage lacks the camaraderie that keeps you fulfilled and having fun. So, you find a platonic friend who may be in the same situation and have fun with him or her. Or, you lack the love of a mother who passed away, whom you adored. So, you find a surrogate mother-type, older and loving, with whom you can secure a safe bond.

With many of my clients, a surrogate has been the perfect way to dissolve old, painful feelings from a parent who was in absentia their entire lives. And, let’s face it, without a few good friends to have fun with and share your woes, we would be lost and alone. Clubs, meet-ups, and coffee groups are the way to get out of yourself and meet new people to fill the empty spaces. Meetup.com is a perfect source to find clubs in your area. Take the steps to help yourself this week by researching ways to create the proper surrogacy in your life to maintain happiness and joy.

Meditation PhotoUncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior CoverGLUTEN FREE COVER

A Cookbook, a Novel, a Self-Help Book, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* * *

 Picture of Learning Alone

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and “being gay” defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

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Canvassing the Past! #anxiety #change #livingintheNOW

In traditional therapy, most people spend a lot of time digging up graves from the past, canvassing the surrounding areas for incriminating evidence as to who was responsible, and then allowing emotions to rise to be healed. I wonder if this old tradition is foolproof. How much of the past is worthy of our amazing present; and, by blaming others, can we honestly take control of our own lives?

Immersing yourself in a feeling is a good idea, WHEN it happens. But, wallowing in it may be the beginning of your demise. A healthy recollection of a moment or catching yourself in the middle of a PTSD trigger can actually help you train your neural pathways for different reactions. Reliving them over and over again cannot help change anything. Doing the latter, you will spend the next ten years in therapy and never move past your negative feelings and blame to take responsibility for your own life.

I speak from experience. I had been abused sexually, emotionally, and physically as a child. I was left by my mother at eight, lived with a raging and abusive alcoholic after that, and was abused sexually by two different men. For many years during therapy, I thought I would never be rid of the ugly, dirty shame that came up from all that went wrong in my past. Then I was introduced to New Thought Religion and, also, alternative therapies for PTSD, including hypnosis, parts therapy, and IFS (Internal Family Systems). All of these modalities and changing my religion helped me so much that I don’t even think about blame anymore. I take complete control of my life now and don’t allow anyone in my life that will seek to control me or push me back into the darkness of my past.

All of you are smart enough to Google all of the above modalities, so I won’t bore you with the particulars of each therapies. I’ll simply say that if you have been spending your life canvassing your past to find cause and blame, you will be digging up graves for the rest of your life. Everything in your past was for a purpose, even the ugliest of moments.

We grew. We matured. We learned to gain strength in the face of distress. We are works of art because of the chiseling tool of the past. It’s time to look at your beautiful life in this moment and start from here to rebuild, take notice, or simply give some well deserved thanks to all that has happened to you to create this wonderfully unique individual.

GLUTEN FREE COVERMeditation PhotoAnxious Attachment Picture

A Cookbook, a Novel, a Self-Help Book, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* * *

Beautiful Bird 

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian 

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and “being gay” defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

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Brush up Your Shakespeare #firstimpressions #change #livingintheNOW

Our world, especially our business acumen, can always change with education. I have taken more classes than I have in a long while. The result is a better memory, more energy, and a feeling as if I’m a student again. This gets me back into a mindset that I’m not finished learning, which is good for anyone’s soul.

The worst place we could be as adults is thinking that we’ve seen or done it all. Every time you look at the world, see a vast array of life and expansive universe that you’ve never noticed. Then, with awe and trepidation, gaze into the beauty as if it will never be there again!

Because, the truth is, beauty is not permanent. Life constantly changes. If you miss an awesome pleasure the first time, another pleasure may come, but it will never be the same as the first. Beauty manifests like a multitude of different snowflakes, never the same. The only consistent thing in life is change! So, make a point of experience all of life in every moment.

 

GLUTEN FREE COVERMeditation PhotoThe_Leaving_Cellar_Cover_for_Kindle

A Cookbook, a Novel, a Self-Help Book, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* * *

 cropped-6009Color1001.jpg

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and “being gay” defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

Please follow and like us:
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