Being Unafraid of Loss
December 31, 2014
As I had spent a great deal of my professional time helping overweight people while I lived in Nashville, the number one issue for weight gain is holding in what you really feel. When your family members coerce you to do favors and bail them out of trouble, when your boss “depends” on only you to get all the extra work done, and when your partner chooses you to vent his anger, this is not a good time to begin shouldering everyone’s burdens. Trust me, you can live through the loss of a codependent friend or partner, but you can’t undo a heart attack from eating yourself into 150 extra pounds.
So much of my life, I have acted and responded in ways that would prevent loss in my life. If a friend treated me unfairly, I would consider how I responded, instead of being authentic or angry. The bottom line was that I was fearful of impending loss. At this present point in my life, I would rather lose what isn’t good or right and be open for what is right, than hold my tongue and be the perfect and steadfast friend who accepts all bullshit. I think the time of being a dumping ground for crap should be over for all of us.
I feel that moving to a new place with new chances at different choices is a great way for me to exercise this part of my decision-making process. I understand when a person married for twenty years comes to me overweight and upset because she had consumed 100% of her family’s problems—physically and mentally. She would have a much more difficult time of undoing and untying from her relationships than I may have severing ties with people I’ve only known for a couple of months. But sever you may have to do, or build some great boundaries that protect you long enough for you to regain your strength, stop stuffing down your problems with food, and take the power you need to heal yourself.
This power I refer to is a God-given right. It’s not something that you garner or gain. It’s a birthright you simply accept. When you do accept it, your entire world changes. Suddenly, you realize that your old paradigm of thought (I can be rejected, I live in loss, I will be alone) can no longer be the foundation of your life. It has never helped you. Perhaps, the relationships you have invested in your entire life have depleted you, instead of affording the right of a steady return.
Only one Power exists that is worth investing in and that is God. This power is the foundation of all and made purely and growing constantly with love. When you get in this flow, you also prosper and gain right relationship, because spirit sees what you can’t. The gift to you is that you trade in your ego understanding of relationship for the omniscient present of Spirit. When you allow yourself to be led and open to the guidance of this loving power, you will have all the strength you need to create a perfect NOW. This is your New Year’s resolution. This is the magnificence you have been longing for your entire life.
A Cookbook, a Novel, a Self-Help Book, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for your family members and friends and support another friend in the process! Thank you and happy Holidays! –Bo
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Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]