Don’t Take Anything Personally #4agreements #judgment

I passed a friend in a hallway. She turned up her nose and barely spoke. By the look on her face, I thought she was angry with me. I spent the entire day wondering what I did to have elicited such a response. I shared my feelings with a mutual buddy who told me that our friend had cracked a rib and also was trying to work through a terrible flu-bug. In other words, her response to me had absolutely NOTHING to do with ME.

Don Miguel Ruiz wrote a very famous book called: The Four Agreements. One of these agreements is to not take anything personally. Ruiz shared this agreement, because we are liable to spend half of our lives imaging what others think about us when it’s none of our business. In fact, another person in our lives (a boss, a coworker, a lover) may not be thinking—probably isn’t thinking—about us at all.

I went to an acting seminar over the weekend. Acting is all about going to auditions and being judged. In the seminar I had the opportunity to view many auditions from the 30 people who took the class with me. What I realized was that many people auditioning had what it took to get the job, but simply weren’t the right character, type, or look. I found myself ferreting out the best, sometimes, for the person who simply looked the part and had what it took to do the job. The actor I chose, often wasn’t the person who was the best actor or actress.

I may have taken the class simply to teach me this important lesson about life. Even in relationships, the person choosing the right lover or mate is always using his/her best interest and desires to pick you or another person. Their choice has nothing to do with you, personally. They may not feel comfortable with your smell or the way you keep house. They may like abuse when you are a nice person. You have no idea, nor should you spend your time deliberating about someone else’s choices.

You pick from a wide variety of choices every day. Sometimes, the choices you make are completely selfish, and other times you choose with deliberation and compassion. Remember, when you feel rejected that God cannot reject God. Every person in your life—and you—are made of the spirit of God; therefore, God is in every choice anyone makes. Ultimately, God is working with you to pick the best life, the most honorable mate, and the perfect friends to compliment YOU!


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If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and “being gay” defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

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Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]




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