Feeling Naked in #Relationship
October 24, 2014
I remember going to a beach in San Francisco, once, with an ex. To get to the beach, we had to climb down a very long and steep set of precarious stairs that were made of rock and old wood, with no railing most of the way, and quite honestly, halfway down, I had wondered if it would be worth it. “It will be amazing,” my ex said with a wry smile. So, I continued climbing, holding a 15 lb. cooler in one hand, a knapsack with blankets and towels on my back, and my other hand almost white from trying to find anything to grab to steady myself.
After we got to the bottom, the beach was indeed a little piece of heaven. Very few people were visiting. The water and sand were not gentrified. And, interestingly, most of the people were naked! I turned to my partner, his smile now beaming. “I told you it would be amazing!” I knew he referred to the naked part more than the beautiful shoreline and gorgeous seascape.
“Don’t think I’m taking my swimsuit off,” I said immediately. I’m not one to be very cavalier in times like these. I supposed I have some body dimorphic issues. In other words, I think my body looks bad, even though it may not.
However, by an hour into our visit, I found myself naked on the blanket, and, sincerely, not caring what people thought. I feel, the reason I changed my mind was because, I had realized the people there weren’t ogling each other; they had come to experience freedom. Actually, for the first time in my life, I did feel rather abandoned about my body and being naked. Though we were born naked, we have been taught that our bodies need to be clothed our entire lives—that we need to be covered. Somehow, this translates to our minds, as well.
If you are in a relationship of any kind, you know that the only way to communicate effectively is to be completely transparent, which translates to mental nakedness. If you haven’t experienced transparency with someone, make it a point to try it. You will never feel freer in your life. However, I’ll implement a caveat. If you don’t have another secure individual communicating with you, your trial will be for naught. When an insecure person enters into a conversation that feels uncomfortably transparent, he or she will avoid it completely. So, our goal in our interpersonal relationships is to find people we can undress in front of mentally, without judgment.
When you find these friends and partners, you will certainly see a complete difference in you and your ability to communicate in a way that is authentic and loving, without condemnation.
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Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]