Forced to Admit Your Reality

Since my husband and I don’t really enjoy the same television shows or have been brought up with the same culture (he in Ireland and I in the states), we choose a television show together in the ON DEMAND preference and binge watch the episodes season by season together. It’s our special time at night that usually ends with meaningful conversations.

Tonight, we watched part of the third season of The Sopranos. The story was about the wife of Tony Soprano, the head of the mob. The wife, Carmel, lives a life of luxury on the outside, but on the inside she has convinced herself that she stays with her husband because of Catholicism. She also has believed in her heart that she doesn’t share her husband’s sins and way of life, so she is somehow vindicated spiritually.

In this episode tonight, she visits a Jewish psychiatrist who shares with her the honest truth about her life. He pulled no punches. He tells her frankly, “You are either a partner with the mob or enabling the man who is in the mob.”

Either way, he wouldn’t accept her payment, because it was given as blood money (money made by the unjust sacrifice of other’s lives and belongings). The look in Carmela’s eyes (the actress, Edie Falco) penetrated our hearts. The episode was so perfectly crafted around Carmela’s realizing her role in the family business was a reality she had to face.

As the show concluded, Dave and I discussed how this show impacted our lives. We talked about the impossibility of living in duality as she has done for so many years. Eventually, one world leads you in the direction away from your true spiritual path. You believe you are stuck in the world that holds all of the family’s secrets, cherished memories, and even what you pretend to not know about your upbringing.

Much of my life I have straddled two worlds. I wanted a beautiful home, hang out with the right people, make a lot of money, and grow spiritually. Eventually, I learned that there are hard choices on a spiritual path. Family members sometimes must part. Best friends must agree to go in their separate directions. Even the perceived career path you are on must change course completely to fulfill your ultimate destiny on this Earth plane.

A spiritual path is like choosing to spend time away from the world, separate from the path of normalcy. You learn to choose only what you know is the Truth, that which has been branded on your heart.

I have finally found peace by relinquishing all of the THINGS that have kept me from a total commitment to spiritual development, every minute of every day. Releasing the past and all things pertinent to holding me captive to it is the most beneficial means to spiritual growth there is. If you’re serious about Spiritual Growth and are reading this blog, you’ll take serious stock in this advice.

So what if you don’t drive a fancy car, have the most beautiful home, make the most money, perform in front of 1000s of people. Life is not about that for us now.

Life is about a daily meditation that leads me on a simple path. This leads us to love and compassion—for ourselves and those around us.

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