August 21, 2013
Hope is a good thing. I believe that hope is similar to faith. But faith without substance is meaningless. Also, hope without moving forward is also meaningless.
Plenty of people have dreams. Some desire to write books. Others want to climb Mount Everest. Some would like to learn to ski or surf. Lots of people long to be movie stars or famous recording artists. But how many of those billions have the moxie to actually pursue a dream?
I can say that I hope to be a writer. If I never put my fingers to the keyboard, you would say that this was a crazy dream. If I never took a course on literature or grammar, you would say that I haven’t moved forward toward my goal. But, yet, so many people work meaningless jobs and expect that someday they will win the lottery and be millionaires. What is the likelihood without buying a ticket? Even then the odds are millions to one.
Why not increase the odds to one hundred to one just by putting one foot in front of the other. When we speak of ascertaining a dream and have no drive to move toward it. This is homeostasis – the tendency toward a relatively stable equilibrium between interdependent elements (from Wikipedia).
Sharon and I were talking about our dreams of the future. We also discussed why some of our dreams and desires hadn’t been fulfilled. One great reason they were not was because of the partners we had in our past.
I read in the book, Attached., by Amir Levine that if I person has a stable, securely attached partner, he or she is more likely to pursue a dream or venture out into the unknown. Why is this so?
Securely attached partners exude a sense of self-assurance and trust that their partners will find what they love without pushing and prodding. They are more likely to wait until their partner decides what they want to pursue and simply encourage those mates toward their dreams.
If you have an anxious or avoidant partner, he or she is more apt to get what he wants and fear that it will get taken away soon after. So, he may latch too tightly to the relationship or, just the opposite, get overweight and expect the same of his partner. “Let’s just end up on the porch swing growing old and fat together.”
This dream comes instead of thinking about moving forward and onward with life as if it had no end. Goals and dreams can be achieved.
So, Sharon and I decided that we are on the right road now. Both of us have securely attached partners and have gotten more work done towards our dreams in the past few months than in the past few years.
Our Gee-I-Hopes have turned into Gee-I-Knows. We can see a future filled with interesting and wonderful ideas realized with our powerful and productive minds. We know wholeheartedly that the key to success lies between our own ears. But one of the biggest successes was to actually find a person able to support our dreams too. That makes a hell of difference when you pursue a daring life toward big aspirations.
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Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com. FOR COMMENTS: Go to the Bo Sebastian link under the title and there is a place there to create a comment. Thanks.
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