How Many People Does It Take to Satisfy You? #relationshipadvice #dating #divorce
April 18, 2014
Today, with the help of a brave friend, I came to the hard conclusion that relationships are changing, living things. Just like all living things, relationships can get sick, bring pain, and even die. On the other side of life, living things can bring joy, like the newborn baby, a puppy dog snuggling close, or a lover wrapped around you in passion. Relationship can bring all of these, if you are open and vulnerable. But, you can avoid one intimate relationship and end up in multiple relationships trying to satisfy your one lonely heart.
Every human being has many “parts.” A psychiatric therapy exists called “Parts Therapy.” The focus is on identifying the Internal Parts of the human mind. You may have a brave part or an avoidant part. This brave part may comingle with a childish part, and even an addict part. All of these Internal Parts exists together to make up the whole.
Worry not! You are not schizophrenic. That diagnosis is left for those who lose time when one of these parts is acting out. In other words, a schizophrenic person actually believes he or she is that one part for a certain time. When s/he comes back to reality, s/he doesn’t remember slipping into another personality.
So, it can be fairly normal to have various different sides of your personality coming out to play everyday, without having a psychiatric diagnosis. You can have a work side. You can have a family side. You can have a philanderer side. You can have a religious side. You can have a sports loving, party side. But, unless all of these parts are working together to make one happy Internal Family, you will be in psychological trouble trying to manage the family without a leader.
Sometimes in relationship, we try to satisfy more than one part of personality with different people. Who knows, maybe some of us can’t be satisfied with just one person. I hope I can find that one person. But, I know for certain, that without the many different kinds of friends in my life, I would be lacking somewhere in my social life. I have some friends who are there for compassion. I have some who make me think and drive me to my best self. I have some friends who are companions. I have other friends who like to party hard. Very few of these personalities are all wrapped up in one person. So, life is likely to lead us to many people to satisfy the entirety of our personality.
But, when this happens in intimate relationship without the consent of the people involved, you end up with a big mess on your hands. My attitude is to find someone for an intimate partner who satisfies a great deal of my needs mentally and physically. Then, invite friends into my life whom I need to fulfill the rest of my psychological needs. If your partner doesn’t like to party, and you’re a party animal. Then make sure you have the consent of your partner to party one evening a month or a week. If your partner is loving and compassionate and passion-filled, but isn’t as smart as you, don’t divorce him or her. Find a surrogate to fulfill the needs of your intellect.
All of life is about understanding this consistently changing mechanism called relationship. In my new book Finding Authentic You, I help you uncover the most distinct you, unlock all of your negative thinking, and help you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship is a fairly easy task.
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For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.
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* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.