Living with Fear and Anxiety #selfcare #spiritualadvice #anxiousattachment #anxiety #psychology
July 10, 2015
When you have grown up in an atmosphere of abandonment and struggle, the neural pathways in your brain tend to get in protection mode, and stay there, even when it’s okay to come out of your shelter. Our brains are brilliant at protecting us from the dangers of bad intentions, ignorant adults, and abusive situations as children; but, can’t tell the difference—as adults—between good and bad input when we get older, especially, if the input appears to be packaged the same. In other words, certain inputs (even loving ones that appear to be similar to old, painful hurts) often trigger old anxiety. How do we deal with this?
Imagine this scenario. You have a computer problem. You cannot figure out what is wrong. Every time you press the “F Key” a warning signal comes up on the computer, like a time bomb, saying: PLEASE SHUT DOWN YOUR COMPUTER, OR ALL OF YOUR DATA WILL BE ERASED!
None of us like to see this message or any message that tell us that something’s wrong with our computer devices. Because we are afraid to mess with what we don’t understand or what we can’t control. So, you take your computer into to be serviced. The technician discovers that the problem was hidden deep in your system folder. Some sneaky malware got downloaded into your system and hid far beneath the surface, just waiting for you to press that F Key.
The serviceman tells you that he can’t remove the malware without erasing your entire system. He can, however, let you press CONTROL F, every time you want to press the F Key. What do you do? Do you let him erase all of your content, or do you use the new “Control F key”?
This scenario is very similar to what happens in the brain when we have problems from the past infect the system hardware of our brain. We can probably erase the entirety of the brain with shock therapy, but we would be a different person with no memories. However, we can learn to press another key or tread lightly around the F Key and know what to expect when we press it, still maintaining the integrity of all of our memories and truths. This is a bandage, at best!
We can treat anxiety with truth, medication, and even hypnosis. But, the reality is, ATTACHMENT DISORDER is like that malware that will always co-abide with us while we are alive. It’s stuck in the neural pathways of our brain. The real peace that we have is learning to circumvent the trauma in our brain by, first, recognizing the problem, then finding ways to overcome the stress. Eventually, we replace old patterns with new ones, like pressing the CONTROL F.
Some of these ways of circumventing our anxiety are as follows:
- When you get triggered and find yourself in an emotional spiral going downward, get to a safe place to be alone. See if you can say an affirmation ALOUD that is undisputable truth for you. Then sit in the silence and feel what comes up. When negativity rises, let it surface, and observe it from a meditative place, instead of in your cognitive mind. Remember, the cognitive mind, is where the problem exists. Getting a perspective outside of the problem often relieves my anxiety.
- Don’t be afraid to take your medication. Sometimes, if you have allowed yourself to get too far into anxiety—sleep and medication will calm you enough to get back to a clear mind.
- Talk to a friend or a counselor. Sometimes, just vocalizing your issues helps you see that you are not in your past, but indeed in your present.
- Lastly, if you are in a situation that continually brings up your past issues and anxiety, you must extract yourself from that situation long enough to learn to deal with it. See a psychologist or therapist for the correct advice as to how to move forward. No one can live in anxiety very long without very harmful, long-term effects.
If you have anxiety issues, managing it is our best hope! Trust me, you can get to the place where you feel as if it has no power over you!
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