When you desire to write a hit song, a novel or finish that painting job in the spare bedroom, do you actually follow through with your intention?
Most people do not. Why do so many people have great ideas and never follow through until the end?
My dad came up with an idea in his workshop in 1967. He took an old motor from one of our destroyed toys and attached two suction cups to parts that rotated. He mounted the rotating cups on a square piece of wood. At Easter, he would take out this contraption, get out some Q-tips and food coloring, and would put the boiled eggs between the suction cups. The eggs would rotate as we applied the food color to the eggshell via a Q-tip.
It was a brilliant idea—in fact, so brilliant that, 15-20 years later, I saw one of the same machines on the shelves around Easter. What if my Dad would have followed through with his brilliant idea, had patented it, and had tried to get it produced? Who knows, because he never did. He just bitched because someone else was making the money from his idea.
I’ve heard this kind of story from almost everyone I know. What stops us from believing in ourselves and following through with goals and ideas?
Continue reading below.
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Continued from above:
Dan Diamond, an author for Forbes magazine says:
For all the good intentions, only a tiny fraction of us keep our resolutions; University of Scranton research suggests that just 8% of people achieve their New Year’s goals.
Why do so many people fail at goal setting, and what are the secrets behind those who succeed? The explosion of studies into how the brain works has more experts attempting to explain the science behind why we make resolutions—and more relevantly, how we can keep them.
Going back to the title of this blog, you can’t get anywhere in your car without applying your foot to the gas pedal. You can stay in the parking lot for days with the ignition on. If you don’t put the car in DRIVE, you go nowhere again! Moving forward is the first priority.
Studies have shown that we can’t move forward when our goals are not easy, succinct, and carefully planned out. In other words, you could decide you need to get a new chair for the living room. You get in the car when suddenly you realize that you have no idea where to acquire the chair. You wonder if there are any sales going on. What’s your budget? Should you charge it or pay cash? How will you get it home? If all of those questions were answered, you may very well get in your car and get the chair.
Take this same scenario and put my good friend Elaine in it. She would be overwhelmed with the choices in front of her, spend the entire day going from store to store and come home empty-handed. It takes her 3-4 hours to grocery shop each week. She also gets upset at a restaurant that has too large a menu. Why?
The answer is simple. Most people go into a restaurant having a hankering for something specific. They go to the page of the menu that has salads, for instance, and choose from one of five or six salads.
Elaine would have began looking at the menu without a plan. She would begin thumbing through the menu. Of course, this simple decision now becomes daunting with 400 choices.
Simplicity is imperative when creating goals. If you want to achieve something, set a small goal first. Don’t say I’m going to write a novel. Instead, say, “I have an idea for a novel. I have decided to spend one hour every day, writing from 10-11 a.m., when I have the house to myself. I’m going to begin this Monday. I’ll give myself 6 or 7 weeks to see what comes of it.”
These very specific and simple goals allow the mind to easily digest in small portions what you plan to consume.
If you told yourself how long it takes to write a novel (often 2 years), you probably would never begin. This is why successful novelists have trouble coming up with their second “big” novel. The writer knows how much time and passion it takes to create a novel, because the first one took 3-5 years.
In summary, to accomplish a goal:
- First, simplify the goal. (I’m going to write daily.)
- Give yourself a launching platform. (I will write when the kids are at school from 10-11 a.m.)
- Set an ample, but shorter, amount of time to see where you are with your goal. (Decide you’ll do this behavior for 6-7 weeks and see where I am.)
- Get some help or join a group that is achieving the same goal. (Join a weekly writers group.)
With just these small pieces, I assure you that you will not find yourself pounding the steering wheel of the car wondering how to go forward! You have that incredible GPS in your mind set to a goal, and a still small voice lets you know well ahead of time when to make the next turn.
You don’t get to this voice if reason or recognize it unless you spend time with yourself in silence, asking yourself important self-talk questions. This is like dating. You must get to know the voice of the Spirit by spending time in meditation and silence. This is the only I know to clearly download the power of wisdom and recognize the voice—IN TIMES OF TRAUMA—that is always directing YOU into safety!
Deciding on and living by your core values is a tenuous challenge. My many years of spiritual coaching and life coaching can help you with this. I have helped many people in this situation see light and overcome the darkness of the past. Give me a call: 954-253-6493. SKYPE sessions are available.
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What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…
What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?
If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?
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Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books:
- How Do You Know if You’re Depressed?
- Your Struggle Has an End