Remodel or Move? #startingover #greysanatomy
March 22, 2014
I have had a floor plan drawn up to remodel my house for five years now and have never moved forward to remodel. I’ve been waiting for someone who shares my vision and will want to make a beautiful home bigger and better to make room for our future. I have spent so much time making all the gardens, pond, and remodels suit my perfect likes, that, as is, the house is enough for just me and my 81-year-old mom. But, the remodel has always been if I find someone special to share my life.
The problem with my plan is that not too many healthy perspective dates want to move into something that is totally yours and built for you. Most people want to begin anew and have equal say in everything that goes into your mutual investment. The reason why I used the modifier “healthy” is, because plenty of perspective relationships exist who would gladly move in and let you have all the vision, spend all the money, and just latch on to your boot straps. Finding someone who is a partner often means starting over. And who the hell wants to do that, right?
Moving completely and starting over is a metaphor for relationships, as well. I have tried to get back with an old flame. It doesn’t matter how long you had been in relationship. When you revisit it, you are going to bring up all that wasn’t resolved and what brought your old relationship crashing to a halt. Sometimes, one person will realize that he screwed up and want back a relationship he literally lost. In that case, you have a different scenario, but rebuilding trust will be paramount in reestablishing this kind of old relationship. I wonder if revisiting the old haunts is a waste of time. Maybe so.
I often tell myself this affirmation: if my mind is half-filled with the past, spirit can’t fit a new person in my life. Past patterns, especially relationship, are hard to break. Last night, I watched “Grey’s Anatomy.” Two of the characters have been going back and forth from marrying to divorcing to playing around, to being friends for the entire run of this show. Last night, the character played by Sandra Oh even went so far as to try and get her ex-husband, Dr. Owen Hunt, to start to date again using the Internet. Owen ended up telling her his truth: “Why would I want to look for someone, when my soul mate sits right in front of me!” The problem is that every time they get back together, the same issues come up with the woman not wanting children. Can they resolve the issue? The reason why the scenario has lasted so long without resolution on the show is because each of us can sympathize that the past is following each of us all day long, everyday.
A happy person knows that everything in life is dying the minute it begins, even relationship. BUT… the smart person loves the next moment more than she frets over losing the past.
The present is full of new and wonderful opportunities. You can’t receive if your arms aren’t open and your face isn’t pointed forward. Look to the now for your gifts. The past will always having you facing in the wrong direction!
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Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com. Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed.
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