Self-Confidence or Hubris? #pride #self-confidence
March 9, 2015
What we believe about ourselves reflects in everything we do, say, and endeavor. So, working on your self-confidence and releasing your fear is essential to reveal your best work.
You cannot hide what is inside of your mind. Nervousness reflects in small ways, even if you think you may be adept at covering your struggle: your lip twitches, you fiddle with your fingers, you shuffle papers, one foot taps, you play with your hair, or your eye may even twitch. While in an interview situations, a person viewing you and assessing your qualities for a job may expect a small amount of nervousness, your confidence cannot manifest in a job such as a surgeon or an actor. You must learn to harness that energy and use it for good.
I have worked with people who have such great self-confidence that they seem almost arrogant. Does this hubris turn into work? You better believe it. Unfortunately, a little bit of over-confidence with an associate is a little too much. But, the jobs tend to go to the people who can convince bosses, directors, and producers that they are the right person for the job. Only one kind of person surfaces in those situations: the person with the confidence.
So, how do you work on your confidence if you have great fear? As a clinical hypnotherapist and life coach, the first thing I look for in a person is the moment their self-confidence waned. Most times, if we can face that moment together, we can begin to change fear into strength. I’ll give you an example.
I had a man client come to me who wanted to learn to sing in public. He had an awesome baritone voice, but, unfortunately, no one would know that, not even his vocal coach, if he couldn’t take his singing from the shower to the stage. So, we began to look at the moment he lost his self-confidence. Just out of college as a voice major, he got his first audition for a Broadway musical. As luck would have it, he was perfect for the role and displayed the kind of confidence in his audition to get the part. During the third week of the run, he went up on his lines in the middle of a song. Instead of faking it, making up words and moving on, he crumbled. He froze.
Fortunately for him, a fellow seasoned actor knew my client’s words in the song, helped him out and had to escort him off of the stage. My client got a warning from the director and some encouragement. However, the next evening, my client was so terrified he would freeze again that he started forgetting his lines at the beginning of the show. This time, he got fired from the show. So, as you can see, his fear was well founded on an event in his past that presented as a major stumbling block in most areas of his life, including introducing himself to new people.
This kind of fear has to be managed, instead of dissolved. In other words, the fear can be a trigger for disaster, or it can be a new trigger for confidence. In this case, I helped him rewire his mind for the latter.
Mental triggers cause physical responses. So, just because you get a negative feeling or thought, it doesn’t mean that you have to let the trigger manifest as a physical fear. It can be rewired in the mind to manifest physical confidence. A good hypnotherapist will be able to give a client exercises and affirmations to connect them with these triggers to change the resulting physical behavior.
If you have issues manifesting fear in physical ways, you may want to give me a call. I still work on Skype and on FaceTime, no matter where you are in the world, I can support your endeavor to make positive change now.
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Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]