Tag: anxious attachment

Waiting for Approval #approval #spiritualadvice #personalpower #newthought

Everyone hates rejection. Coming in a close second is the feeling of maybe being rejected and maybe being approved. How many of you have applied for something (loan, school, jobs) and spent the next month anxiously anticipating if you were good enough, right enough, liquid enough, or adequate enough to receive that letter of approval?

Screen Shot 2016-05-11 at 10.04.32 AMI have experienced this feeling a thousand times. If you are an artist, writer, actor, or in any area of the arts in which you have to be judged or auditioned to receive jobs, you probably experience this feeling almost every day. The subconscious reason I chose some of my careers is to get over my fear of rejection. At this point, I’m almost able to release my fears to the greater good and relinquish the idea that I have any kind of mental or physical power to turn the tide in my direction.

https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=bo+sebastian&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Abo+sebastian

Your only job and my only job is to do your part in the creative process: plant the seed, stay positive, and continue to move forward on a path of growth. All else is up to the Powers that Be. I don’t need to name what these powers are, because they really have no name. You can call your personal idea of power and source anything you want. You can even call it luck. However, what you can’t do is manipulate it.

Almost every fear comes down to this one ugly idea: rejection. If you have been adopted at birth, had rough beginnings with parents or guardians, were an outcast or different as a child, you probably experiences more of these feelings than most people.

These kinds of rejection feelings come from a deep feeling of abandonment, an empty space never filled by love at the beginning stages of life. This is called Anxious Attachment. This anxiousness is one reason you get in relationships too quickly or at the first sign of someone wanting or approving in you. Then, you only find out later that this person—who says he or she loves you—is actually a narcissist, or worse, a hateful letch who has gracefully discerned your neediness only to abuse it.

This happens more than you can possibly imagine. In my Life Coaching business, I see people who have Anxious Attachment Disorder and have been in a string of horrible relationships. They come to me to get out of their desperate attempt to fill a gaping hole that never seems to be able to attain enough love. I get it. I’m the poster child for this kind of behavior. I’m also here to tell you there are answers and there are ways to get over this gnawing, aching feeling.

The story of your life, everything you embark upon in the future, choose from now on, and even eliminate in your life starts in your mind. The mind is a powerful source of energy. (Noticed I didn’t say brain. The Mind and the brain are two very difference sources.)

The brain is the processor of thought. The Mind is All Creative Thought in you and in the universe. When we tap into the Creative Mind in our quiet and contemplative times, we experience a complete download of loving, peaceful, and powerful ideas that can lead us to our human purpose and ultimately to joy and peace.

You can learn more about “anxious attachment” and “releasing the past” simply by searching for these two strings in the search box in the upper right hand corner of this page.

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My new book is coming out in just one month: “Your New Story, Your New Life” The Metaphysical Mind. If you want to be the first to read this story, sign up for the launch mailing list at mailto:BoSebastian5@gmail.com.Screen Shot 2016-05-11 at 10.04.32 AM

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Are you in need of Life or Spiritual Coaching? I’ve been a life coach and clinical hypnotherapist and minister of New Thought for 25 years. I do my sessions online, so you can even have your session in bed, so that you can go directly to sleep during the hypnosis session. You must have a laptop or a notebook to do these sessions, either on Skype or Facetime. You give me a call at 954-253-6493. My fee is $95 for an hour.

You can find all of my Books by Category at http://www.bosebastian.com/new-page/ All of these books have been birthed from my own spiritual growth. I guarantee you’ll enjoy how each will help you maintain a positive mind, body, and spirit. Also, if you click on the Amazon site, you’ll see all of my 15 book— Cookbooks, Novels, Self-Help Books, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

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A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?cropped-cropped-6009Color1001.jpg

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

 

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WHEN YOU PRAY: Believe that You Have… and You Shall Receive! #spiritualprincipal #divineMind #SOM #Christmas

The Master Teacher, Jesus, taught us “to pray, believing that we have, and THEN, we shall receive.” The word shall does not mean immediately. It denotes the future. He specifically does not say, when you pray you will receive what you want right then.

So, saying what you need is Step 1. Believing is Step 2. And then, waiting for God, is Step 3.

Why is it that we wait for everything in life: our pay checks, plants to grow, fruit to ripen, relationships to develop, but we have trouble believing in the one consistent message of Jesus: Wait upon the Lord?

We are a race of anxious people. We have a Santa-Claus mentality when it comes to receiving our good. Not many people are willing to work for… or wait for… anything in this world. Remember the days when you wrote a letter? You would have to wait for the receiver to get the letter, write back to you, then for the mail to deliver the letter.

One bit of communication could take three weeks. Where now, all we do is open our cell devices, send a message to any part of the world, and we immediately get answers. When we don’t receive with immediacy, often we move on, barely ever wanting to wait for anyone or any reward. What kind of people are becoming and are we raising our children to be?

I know with certainty that we cannot stop how quickly the world is moving toward fast-paced communication, but for important things that we know must take time and faith, we also must learn a different methodology for our desires. This method is called prayer and faith, the method of Jesus!

For instance, if you want a loving relationship, you may need to wait for the right person to come along. Moving through fifteen different on-line dating sites, still, will not manifest the person you are meant to love fully. But, if you insist on trying so hard, because of your anxious need to be fulfilled; you will, indeed, find someone—but, perhaps, not the someone you have prayed for. This kind of anxious behavior may be manifesting from Anxious Attachment Disorder, which resulted from a strong need to bond with a loving parent as a child.

But, instead of working through this issue now clinically with a professional, we circumvent traditional ways of change to get what we need right now. I wonder how this will manifest in the long run.

My suggestion is that you balance your immediate lives with some contemplation and meditation each day, so that you can observe yourself and your decisions and rectify those places in your life that you control or manipulate.

A contemplative life, will also let you know when you need to wait for God, because you listen to your thoughts and to your body in a consistent way. Also, too, you will develop a stronger spiritual connection, which will give you peace when you make decisions that support your loving life.

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This year, if you desire to commit to a change for a New Year’s Resolution, do it with your MIND first. Remember, as in the title of my new book coming out just in time to help you with this (in January)… lol… that all change happens in your mind, first. You must change your Old Story, to make a consistent and long lasting change in Your Life.

Please be looking for “YOUR NEW STORY, YOUR NEW LIFE, Unlock Your Seven Spiritual Discoveries” in bookstores and in online bookstores in January 2016!

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Faccbooknewest12-22Are you in need of Life or Spiritual Coaching? I’ve been a life coach and clinical hypnotherapist and minister of New Thought for 25 years. I do my sessions online, so you can even have your session in bed, so that you can go directly to sleep during the hypnosis session. You must have a laptop or a notebook to do these sessions, either on Skype or Facetime. You can give me a call at 954-253-6493. My fee is $95 for an hour.

You can find all of my Books by Category at http://www.bosebastian.com/new-page/ All of these books have been birthed from my own spiritual growth. I guarantee you’ll enjoy how each will help you maintain a positive mind, body, and spirit. Also, if you click on the Amazon site, you’ll see all of my 15 book— Cookbooks, Novels, Self-Help Books, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?cropped-cropped-6009Color1001.jpg

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

 

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When Past Hurts Return! #healingthepast #pastrelationship #relationshipadvice #divorce

Have you ever opened your heart to someone whom had hurt you, because you felt as if you were healed enough to face the past? Then, you realized, amidst the doing, that you simply were adding drama to your life by inviting that person back into your life?

One of the greatest hurts in my life resulted from doing just that. After eight years and a nasty breakup, I decided to forgive my ex and invited him back into my life, because he was going through a painful break. The result, my ex ended up having a torrid love affair with my current partner of eight years. From that day forward, I have tried to keep the past in the past and the present where it belongs.

Recently, though, I went against my own advice and cracked open that door to a casual hello to someone who had hurt me fairly recently. My excuse and my rational was that I did not want to keep holding hurt in my own heart and wanted to make amends.

The visit went well. We were both a little uncomfortable. But, the result was even more hurtful than before. I chastised myself over and over again.

  • Why did I open that door?
  • Was I trying to see if I still had feelings?
  • Was I hoping he had changed?
  • Was I thinking that I could convert the old situation into a positive one?

All of these questions were viable ones, but none were ones that were good enough to go against my own soul’s boundaries. Here is what I learned after spending the last two days almost completely quiet, searching for truth:

Everyone in my life, whether they choose to hurt me or support me is doing me a favor. EVERYONE!

The reason I have come to this conclusion is because each person is like a road sign steering me in the direction I need to be. Road signs warn you, keep you safe, and give you information about the unexpected coming ahead. When a sign says, “Stop,” or “Go in another direction!” You should be thankful for the knowledge the sign gives. Do not decide you know better than the sign. You could avoid a major collision if you simply pay attention to the road signs.

But, instead, old anxious attachment behavior comes up from the past and decides it wants to heal the past using a particular relationship. Daddy hurt me and now I need to make sure that Relationship X does not mirror my dad’s relationship with me. I need to, want to, have to… change the scenario! But, nothing changes, really, not in your mind and certainly not in the people who have hurt you.

My resolve is that every one of us on this earth shares in the One Mind of God. We were all made in Its image; therefore, we all have something that makes us related. It is within that one part of Divine Mind that we are all being steered into the right direction by the positive people and MOST IMPORTANTLY THE REJECTION!

Don’t let the neural pathways of your human brain steer you. You’ll end up going in circles around your pain.

After this past week, I can say with fortitude in my heart that I’m thankful for the STOP SIGNS in my life. They all have a face. They all are doing the will of God. They all have meaning. And each deserves my COMPLETE ATTENTION.

What they don’t deserve is my anger, my hurt, my negative behavior, and the distraction they cause in my life.

Amen.

***

Are you in need of Life or Spiritual Coaching? I’ve been a life coach and clinical hypnotherapist and minister of New Thought for 25 years. I do my sessions online, so you can even have your session in bed, so that you can go directly to sleep during the hypnosis session. You must have a laptop or a notebook to do these sessions, either on Skype or Facetime. You can give me a call at 954-253-6493. My fee is $95 for an hour.

Anxious Attachment Picture

You can find all of my Books by Category at http://www.bosebastian.com/new-page/ All of these books have been birthed from my own spiritual growth. I guarantee you’ll enjoy how each will help you maintain a positive mind, body, and spirit. Also, if you click on the Amazon site, you’ll see all of my 15 book— Cookbooks, Novels, Self-Help Books, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* * *

 cropped-6009Color100.jpg

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

 

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