All those who don’t believe you can achieve what you set out to do, stomp your feet! Wow! I think I feel the earth moving under my feet… Most of us have energy around this.
I had a conversation with my good friend Sharon. We were talking about not doing what you commit to do and how it affects your self-esteem. I have always been taught that the psychological ramifications of “not doing what you set out to do” affect your self-esteem more than you know. By going against your own will, you set your self on a course of not trusting your own intentions. If you don’t trust yourself, it makes it very hard to trust someone else.
I know that if I have an intention for the day and don’t accomplish it, I feel like I have dishonored myself and my time. Now, if I had no choice in the matter—for example, an emergency hospital visit—I wouldn’t feel that way. However, if I had chosen to do something else besides what I had set out to do, my anxiety about the chore would build up. Some times the energy of stress around “not doing something” gets so bad, that it becomes anxiety. This anxiety can build a wall around the very accomplishment you set out to achieve. This means that in the subconscious you have built a trigger to be upset around the idea of finishing what you started.
An underlying animosity toward myself also happens when I look in the mirror and see 10 pounds I don’t want to have hanging over my belt. If I keep saying, “Today is the day of my diet,” and I choose to eat cake and cookies and candy again (because Allen brought them home), I don’t feel good about myself. This behavior can’t help but affect my self-worth. And, though I joke about it, life becomes more difficult if you have someone living with you who frequently eats sweets and carbs, and you’re trying to avoid them. You will find it very difficult to avoid what is directly in front of you.
Most of our intentions have to do with habit breaking, but other than ill-begotten intentions, there are plenty of things in our lives we set out to do—a book we want to write, a class we want to take, a paper we need to finish, a room that needs painting—but never complete.
Listen, a person in the world doesn’t exist who hasn’t, at one point, had trouble accomplishing something. This is normal. But, when you see almost everything in your life is half-finished, you know you have an issue.
Perhaps, it’s an anxious feeling; maybe an avoidant feeling. But you can be assured it is a neuropathic pathway that is settling for less than you deserve. You may have to become the dreaded parent in your own life and treat yourself with a strong arm of intent. By this, I mean that your subjective, observer mind must communicate with your objective mind as if it were a parent.
Personally, I find some object I really want or something I would love to do (vacation, new car, new outfit, skiing). I hold this object or activity captive until I complete my intended task. This gives me a reason to finish my work and takes my mind off of the anxiety and on to the prize ahead.
If this doesn’t work for you, you may consider some hypnosis. Listening to an MP3 that continually tells your mind that you are, not only capable, but willing to finish what you have started, can change your mind in a period of a week. Most of us listen to the negative tapes and watch the negative films in our minds of the past anyway. We might as well wash our minds clean with new thought and positive affirmations in the form of a hypnotherapeutic recording.
Good luck with your projects. I know now you are creating a pathway to truth for you and for your project that will lead you to perfect completion. As a result, your self-worth is becoming the true you that you intend to be. And so it is.
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Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com. FOR COMMENTS: Go to the Bo Sebastian link under the title and there is a place there to create a comment. Thanks.
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