Tag: coming out

Being Right, Being Perfect, Being Wrong! #inspiration #greglouganis #lifepurpose #spiritualadvice #perfectionism

Even a broken clock is right two times a day. The only difference between perfection and having faults is your acceptance of either. The incredible Olympic diver, Greg Louganis, said about his life with his difficult coach (paraphrased): even though every day he forced me toward perfection and humiliated and pushed me to my limits, I would never be the diver I had become. Even still, as I’m sure Greg feels now, perfection didn’t make him happy or complete his soul… His moment of power came when he hit the diving board, got low scores, and bled into the pool drops of his imperfection, which led him to a life that changed the world forever. He came out of the gay closet and shared his incredible story about being HIV positive. His perfection as a diver left people speechless, but his imperfection changed the way the world thinks!

I consider perfection daily. My dad forced our entire family toward perfection. As a result, I worked very hard to be the one to whom he never aimed his fiery darts. So, that meant being flawless daily! I was the perfect son. I never got in trouble, never smoked, drank, always got straight A’s, and said the right things. Even so, things didn’t always go my way. As we all know, perfection is an illusion.

I remember after getting a 4.0 throughout high school, I had a deviated septum operation that took me out of school for three weeks. During that time I had to make up a great deal of schoolwork while I was very sick. As a result, I got two B’s on my report card that term, which made me go from being first in my class to fourth. I was absolutely, utterly devastated. I begged the two teachers to change my grades, to let me do extra credit to change my grades. One teacher acquiesced, the other didn’t. So, as a result, the perfection I worked for my entire high school career, went from number one to number three!

I sat with the feeling of losing what was mine for years. I thought, for too long, if I’m not perfect in every way, I won’t be liked, I’ll lose what’s mine, and I’ll never attract anyone to my life who is worthwhile. So, I spent many years sword fighting with the wind.

The truth is you have to TRUST YOUR HOPES, NOT YOUR FEARS.

As for perfection, if you can’t hide your faults: Paint them chartreuse!

****

Take a look at my very simple and small book, Meditation, Meditation, Meditation. Also, I provide a specific, personalized service, creating personalize meditation MP3 for you. I do this for a mere $25. The process is simple. You email me what you would like to understand, have clarity about, or tell me you just want to quiet your mind. I take it from there and create a twenty-minute Mp3 that you can download on to your computer or cell phone. You pay either by secure credit card over the phone or Paypal. It’s that simple! My email: bosebastian5@gmail.com

Meditation Bookcover Billy Ray's Secret CoverThe_Leaving_Cellar_Cover_for_KindleGLUTEN FREE COVER

A Cookbook, a Novel, a Self-Help Book, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* * *

 Brahma

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and “being gay” defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

Please follow and like us:
0

Coming Out of the Spiritual Closet

Coming out of the closet immediately makes one think of a man or woman finally admitting that he or she is gay. Lately, I’ve noticed that spirituality has become a somewhat closeted matter among gay people and socialites. Very few people want to discuss their beliefs or proclaim what they believe in public for fear of being classified as a lunatic.

I have played the part of many different sides of spirituality from a devout Christian minister passing out Tracts on the NYC streets to a fairly New Thought Christian/Buddhist Yogi. When my friends try to define who I am to an acquaintance, they don a perplexed look. “What exactly do you believe?” I’m often asked.

Our spiritual walk, no doubt, needs to be something we practice in private. We don’t ever need to parade our beliefs with flags and cymbals overtly pushing it in other’s faces, but we also need not fear to express it when appropriate.

Today at the YMCA in East Nashville, I substituted for a yogi friend. After class, I lost my IPhone. A few people in the class and associates tried to help. I was a bit frantic, until I found it in the locker room. On the way out, I said, “It was by the grace of God it was still there.”

An African American woman followed me to my car and said, “Isn’t it nice to be at a place where you can proclaim the grace of God and not fear being ridiculed?”

I agreed. This, of course, made me wonder just how much people fear sharing their beliefs.

I’m always shocked how many times I’m at a bar or party, and someone will begin chatting with me about a spiritual experience. After gushing through the story, the person will often exclaim, “I’ve never shared that with anyone before.”

I smile, cautiously. All it took was the knowledge that I am a spiritually open individual for them to seek me. I didn’t have to go preach on the end of the bar. Often people come up to me and share how their meditation is getting along, how they are enjoying yoga, or how singing spiritual music is so uplifting.

The church I go to, Center of Spiritual Living Nashville, is a very open community. The only prerequisite of being a member or attending is that your intent is to search for the good in yourself and others. That’s all! No one judges you from the moment you enter the doors, until you leave with a smile on your face. When I found this church after so much judgment, I breathed a vast sigh of relief.

Centers of Spiritual Living and Unity Churches have often been classified by bible-based Christianity as nonChristian churches. But this is furthest from the truth. The founders of both churches were very Christian. They simply took the words of Jesus to heart and began healing themselves and teaching others to make effective change in their minds and lives. “The Daily Word” is a perfect example of something that many people read but never knew was started by the Unity Church. I know many denominations have their own versions of Daily Word now, but I remember a time when Unity was the only publication out there. Many Christians read this publication never knowing that Unity was the publisher.

Yet, Unity and Centers of Spiritual Living ministers have long been considered the bottom of the barrel in Christian circles. I remember the first time a Baptist preacher showed up where I was the music minister of a Unity church and brought his choir to sing. We were all amazed that this forward-moving minister was proudly showing his face in a denomination that was long considered a church that lacked the salvation scriptures, deeming it not bible-based.

It really doesn’t matter what you believe to me. Just looking inside and discovering that something exists that is larger and greater than your self is a clear step toward compassion and greater love. You don’t have to be anything or believe anything the way it is prescribed by a certain religion. You can create from your heart what you believe. Even the Christian bible says that in the final days of the earth, the word of God will be written on the hearts of men and women. I believe that day is now.

Trusting the growth of our spirituality to anyone is difficult. I believe you should be careful and prayerful when you search for a spiritual mentor. This person should certainly be led to you by God and Spirit alone. Make sure you feel safe and are able to be completely authentic with this person, before you ever begin this tenuous and awesome process.

When you discover who you are and what you believe, take the next step to be honest with the people you know and love. Share with your heart what you feel. Don’t be afraid to say a prayer before you eat, or offer a word of prayerful encouragement to someone in need. Just don’t force spirituality on anyone. If you honor all beliefs, then you will, most likely, be honored back for your personal belief.

For many years I have been blessed to be out of the closet in two large ways in life, as a gay man and as a spiritual man of God. I’m not afraid to be either. And neither should you.

* * *

Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com.

I am trying to spread the word about my blog and I need your help. Please let your friends know it exists, if it gives you hope and blesses you each day. If you are looking to enter the RSS or Atom Feed, you have to go to the home page of the blog to get there. Also, I write this Blog as a part of Finding Authentic You Ministries. If you would like to send an offering or a tithe, your donation would greatly be appreciated: 5001 Maywood Drive, Nashville, TN 37211.

And I would be greatly pleased for you to share anything that you read by clicking the share button in Facebook.com/bo.sebastian, or add it to your Twitter at BoSebastian; or LinkedIN at Bosebastian5@gmail.com; or find this blog home at www.FindingAuthenticYou.com. Any of my books can be found on Amazon or Barnes and Nobel, just by typing my name in the search header.

Please follow and like us:
0

Win Back What You Lost

I had a woman friend who had lost everything—her business, her marriage, got kicked out of her church, lost some dear friends, and lost so much vital energy to live—to be the authentic woman she was intended to be. She had been lying to the world, her church, her friends, her family, and parents about her lifestyle. And as a result of coming clean to them, she had had to sacrifice most of her old life. Even people who loved her dearly, dismissed her because of being gay.

Does that mean that she should want her old life back? Or was everything in her life conspiring to put away the past and begin anew with everything fresh and real?

I am very compassionate to this situation. I don’t, for a moment, believe this is a laughing matter or even a matter to discuss without permission. However, when someone like me and this woman friend are denied access to our lives as a result of being exactly who we were created to be, it becomes a matter of standing up and being counted—looking down at the gun barrel courageously and asking the pertinent questions to an unforgiving world.

The woman was kicked out of her church after a woman co-pastor had taken her on retreat and come on to her sexually. After my friend denied the pastor, she was brought before the board and kicked out for being gay. No one on the board believed her claims. She simply stepped out of the spot light and into a dramatic funk!

Incidences like this happen all the time. Married men who step out on their wives with other men in private, often come down the hardest on gay men and women. Remember what happened when Jimmy Swaggart preached so harshly about sexual sin, and he was the one hiring prostitutes?

People who are downtrodden because of race and sexuality have to make a public display of self-righteous immorality to make a stand to regain their power. However, showing that bias exists, doesn’t bring back your God-given desire and will to live. The will to live, my friend, must come with loving yourself for exactly who you are. Also, you must accept yourself in this moment, right now, for the person you are authentically.

I have journals of self-flagellating letters written to myself for my perceived sin to humanity and God. I can write volumes on how hard it is to love yourself when you believe that God hates you for living a life against His will. I also, can’t tell you how many times in my prayers and meditations during that time, I heard a still small voice beg me to release from condemning myself. I heard God say over and over again that I was made of love and was loving—that there was no judgment coming from the heavens—only the people on earth.

I just never believed what I was hearing was coming from God. Because I believed the words of preachers and bible-thumpers wholeheartedly, I wouldn’t even listen to the voice of God comforting my hurt and hardened soul.

We can’t undo what has happened to us in the past for our self-denial or distrust of those who loved us with stipulations, but we can take steps now to reach deep into our hearts and live the most authentic life we can muster. Then, it is up to the world to accept or reject us. We have no power over hypocrisy. We can only continue to show up unabashed and unashamed for whom we are.

I just assume that if I’m rejected by a friend or family member, that this is just one way that God tells me I’m in the wrong place, hanging with the wrong person. Trust me, I tell there are plenty of loving and accepting people in this world. If you look hard enough, you will find them ready and willing to love you for exactly the person you are.

Keep your head up. I know God love you as much and more than I do—no matter what your situation.

* * *

Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com.

I am trying to spread the word about my blog and I need your help. Please let your friends know it exists, if it gives you hope and blesses you each day. If you are looking to enter the RSS or Atom Feed, you have to go to the home page of the blog to get there. Also, I write this Blog as a part of Finding Authentic You Ministries. If you would like to send an offering or a tithe, your donation would greatly be appreciated: 5001 Maywood Drive, Nashville, TN 37211.

And I would be greatly pleased for you to share anything that you read by clicking the share button in Facebook.com/bo.sebastian, or add it to your Twitter at BoSebastian; or LinkedIN at Bosebastian5@gmail.com; or find this blog home at www.FindingAuthenticYou.com. Any of my books can be found on Amazon or Barnes and Nobel, just by typing my name in the search header.

Please follow and like us:
0
Loading...
X

Enjoy this blog? Please spread the word :)