Tag: goal Setting

Make Plans, Sit in Car, Never Put Foot on Gas… HELP!

When you desire to write a hit song, a novel or finish that painting job in the spare bedroom, do you actually follow through with your intention?

Most people do not. Why do so many people have great ideas and never follow through until the end?

My dad came up with an idea in his workshop in 1967. He took an old motor from one of our destroyed toys and attached two suction cups to parts that rotated. He mounted the rotating cups on a square piece of wood. At Easter, he would take out this contraption, get out some Q-tips and food coloring, and would put the boiled eggs between the suction cups. The eggs would rotate as we applied the food color to the eggshell via a Q-tip.

It was a brilliant idea—in fact, so brilliant that, 15-20 years later, I saw one of the same machines on the shelves around Easter. What if my Dad would have followed through with his brilliant idea, had patented it, and had tried to get it produced? Who knows, because he never did. He just bitched because someone else was making the money from his idea.

I’ve heard this kind of story from almost everyone I know. What stops us from believing in ourselves and following through with goals and ideas?

Continue reading below.

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Continued from above:

Dan Diamond, an author for Forbes magazine says:

For all the good intentions, only a tiny fraction of us keep our resolutions; University of Scranton research suggests that just 8% of people achieve their New Year’s goals.

Why do so many people fail at goal setting, and what are the secrets behind those who succeed? The explosion of studies into how the brain works has more experts attempting to explain the science behind why we make resolutions—and more relevantly, how we can keep them.

Going back to the title of this blog, you can’t get anywhere in your car without applying your foot to the gas pedal. You can stay in the parking lot for days with the ignition on. If you don’t put the car in DRIVE, you go nowhere again! Moving forward is the first priority.

Studies have shown that we can’t move forward when our goals are not easy, succinct, and carefully planned out. In other words, you could decide you need to get a new chair for the living room. You get in the car when suddenly you realize that you have no idea where to acquire the chair. You wonder if there are any sales going on. What’s your budget? Should you charge it or pay cash? How will you get it home? If all of those questions were answered, you may very well get in your car and get the chair.

Take this same scenario and put my good friend Elaine in it. She would be overwhelmed with the choices in front of her, spend the entire day going from store to store and come home empty-handed. It takes her 3-4 hours to grocery shop each week. She also gets upset at a restaurant that has too large a menu. Why?

The answer is simple. Most people go into a restaurant having a hankering for something specific. They go to the page of the menu that has salads, for instance, and choose from one of five or six salads.

Elaine would have began looking at the menu without a plan. She would begin thumbing through the menu. Of course, this simple decision now becomes daunting with 400 choices.

Simplicity is imperative when creating goals. If you want to achieve something, set a small goal first. Don’t say I’m going to write a novel. Instead, say, “I have an idea for a novel. I have decided to spend one hour every day, writing from 10-11 a.m., when I have the house to myself. I’m going to begin this Monday. I’ll give myself 6 or 7 weeks to see what comes of it.”

These very specific and simple goals allow the mind to easily digest in small portions what you plan to consume.

If you told yourself how long it takes to write a novel (often 2 years), you probably would never begin. This is why successful novelists have trouble coming up with their second “big” novel. The writer knows how much time and passion it takes to create a novel, because the first one took 3-5 years.

In summary, to accomplish a goal:

  • First, simplify the goal. (I’m going to write daily.)
  • Give yourself a launching platform. (I will write when the kids are at school from 10-11 a.m.)
  • Set an ample, but shorter, amount of time to see where you are with your goal. (Decide you’ll do this behavior for 6-7 weeks and see where I am.)
  • Get some help or join a group that is achieving the same goal. (Join a weekly writers group.)

With just these small pieces, I assure you that you will not find yourself pounding the steering wheel of the car wondering how to go forward! You have that incredible GPS in your mind set to a goal, and a still small voice lets you know well ahead of time when to make the next turn.

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You don’t get to this voice if reason or recognize it unless you spend time with yourself in silence, asking yourself important self-talk questions. This is like dating. You must get to know the voice of the Spirit by spending time in meditation and silence. This is the only I know to clearly download the power of wisdom and recognize the voice—IN TIMES OF TRAUMA—that is always directing YOU into safety!

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Deciding on and living by your core values is a tenuous challenge. My many years of spiritual coaching and life coaching can help you with this. I have helped many people in this situation see light and overcome the darkness of the past. Give me a call: 954-253-6493. SKYPE sessions are available.

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A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493
(Sessions CAN BE DONE via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books:

 

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What Goal Drives Your Life? #goalsetting #dreaming #spiritualadvice

For twenty years at the end of December, I would take a trip by myself to dream, journal, and manifest a palpable vision of the coming year. When I would return from my time alone, I would have an outline of goals, desires, and specific activities I would always set out to accomplish. Looking back at my life, keeping to this set of goals is what helped me complete 15 books, a yoga DVD, ten MP3’s, a solo album, becoming a yogi master, working on stage in NYC, in films, and television, building a successful business for years in Nashville, and all of the other smaller but relevant accomplishments in my life. I have stayed on course, even when I didn’t see any kind of financial manifestations for some of the goals, especially with my books and with my art. Holding on to a dream is absolutely the most important part of achieving your desires in life.

One year, however, I set out on my yearly quest to find that my only goal was to NOT HAVE A GOAL. I prayed and meditated, as I had usually done, but nothing came to mind but this one antithesis of my normal goal setting. When I returned home that year, I realized that this new goal was a spiritual goal that was much harder than any goal I had ever attempted. In fact, what I believed spirit was trying to teach me was to honor the NOW and get out of my head about what I believed I could accomplish. You see, accomplishing many things became my goal. But accomplishments are not necessarily the divine ingredient for spiritual success.

Yes, we have to have our foot on the gas and be in the driver’s seat to move forward in life, but without spiritual direction, we can drive in circles for our entire life and never find peace and joy. When I see the difference between being LED and using books and outlines to move forward, I can certainly see why I had spent two years trying to undo my old story about success.

Just before I moved to Florida, I took six months to write my old story. I actually completed a manuscript using my old story, which I’m now shopping with an agent to publishers. I decided that I needed to transcribe my old ways, reread and edit my story, then release my past, completely, to the universe to be able to settle into a brand new paradigm in Florida. I go into meditation with this one simple intent:

To be a conduit of spirit.

When I awaken, I usually have a clear idea of what needs to be accomplished that day. If I hear nothing, I work on things that are my personal goals like a singing act I’m producing with a friend, writing another book, practicing the piano, definitely exercising every day, or maybe just relaxing with a good book.

Divine Purpose comes first in life. When Spirit doesn’t lead me to a goal in one specific day, I realize another harder goal: Waiting in the Silence! When you understand how to be at peace in nothingness, you begin to understand God in you in a completely and new way!

In the silence there is a secret place, a secret meeting place. God is there!

Picture of Learning AloneMeditation PhotoCookbook Cover

A Cookbook, a Novel, a Self-Help Book, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

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 Beautiful Bird

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and “being gay” defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

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A Struggle to the Finish Line

Over the course of my entire life, I have watched many people hustle and work hard toward a degree, weight loss, quitting a habit, starting a business, or unpacking a houseful of furniture and clothes. The drive to get to the finish starts off like a rocket ship jet streaming through the air toward the moon. But just as it reaches the moon’s surface, it hits some kind of extra terrestrial gravity, which pulls it away from the goal and into an “extended stay” orbit. Just enough energy keeps the person circling the moon like the Jews around the promise land.

What keep you from finishing what you start?

Will and desire often begin with a great epiphany. For instance, suddenly, you realize that you must become a registered nurse before you get too old to study. You are tired of bartending, realize that your music career may never happen, and you desire something that will give you a chance to settle in and get a pension. So, you go to back school, study hard as the teachers push you toward the finish line. Then, one final step happens: You have to pass your boards!

Amazingly, you stop in your tracks. You can’t seem to even crack one book to study. You have tried study groups, which force you to begin the process. Every time, however, the chore of getting prepared becomes more difficult.

In this kind of case, I always—always find a way to reward myself for the end challenge. I find something that I want with all my heart, and keep myself from it until I have accomplished that which I have set out to do.

Once, I told myself that I would not take another vacation until all my bills were paid off except for the house. I struggled for three years taking every extra dime to get those credit cards down and the car paid off. In the end, it was worth it. Being debt free feels incredible. I was able to save for a vacation in two months and used cash instead of depending on credit for the entire trip.

Goal setting becomes the most important facet of finishing a task. If you are not one to finish things you begin, you must create a scenario in your life that forces you to make time for your success! The challenge is a spiritual one. Your ego doesn’t want you to face change or accomplishment. It never does. Your ego would have you stymied by your indecision and ambivalence for as long as it can. The ego knows innately that you cannot find true peace until you finish your task. So, it creates an illusion to keep you from it.

I don’t care what that illusion is. God is stronger. “This isn’t an ego goal!” Say it to yourself about ten times. Now begin to believe that God wants you to be the best you can be. Spirit wants to direct your path toward peace, always. What and whom you have been fighting to finish is not yourself, it is God!

Go to HomePage: www.BoSebastian.com

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Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com. Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed.

I am trying to spread the word about my blog and I need your help. Please let your friends know it exists, if it gives you hope and blesses you each day. I would be greatly pleased for you to share anything that you read by clicking the share button in Facebook.com/bo.sebastian, or add it to your Twitter at BoSebastian; or LinkedIN at Bosebastian5@gmail.com; or find this blog home at www.FindingAuthenticYou.com. Any of my books can be found on Amazon or Barnes and Nobel, just by typing my name in the search header.

Also, be looking for “Finding Authentic You, 7 Steps to Effective Change” with a Year to CLEAR (C-ompassion, L-ove, E-nthusiasm A-nd R-elationship-Ready) in Early 2014. Thanks!

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