Tag: PTSD

Disaster Relief: The Child’s Mind

If memory serves me, I was about 10 when I remember the first riot in Beaver Falls, PA. My teenage brother came home bloodied and explained with racially charged language that the African Americans had started a protest. He and his buddies were going to end it.

I thought, Why would people want to start a big fight while the world was already at war? Was a war going to break out in my back yard?

I was a smart young man, straight A’s in school, but I had a lot of struggle around  me, war and fighting. Not only was the country in the middle of Vietnam and friends and family being drafted, but the internal struggle of my own family was far from peaceful. 

Last evening as my husband and I were sharing, I had a PTSD moment. I remembered my father taking me in to his bedroom at about 12 years old, pulling down his underwear, and asking me to rub his naked ass with lotion. The memory made me wince.

 

I couldn’t continue to talk about it with my husband without wanting to vomit. I hadn’t remembered the moment in a long time. I don’t believe my father was a pedophile. He was, however, too cheap to hire a massage therapist, his ass hurt, and he needed someone to rub it.

 

He knew better than to ask one of my four sisters, so I was the one he chose. Of course, he had no idea the mark he left on me from the 30 minutes of the most discomfort I think I felt throughout my childhood, and that’s compared to watching my brother being bloodied by the same father countless times with a hard fist and a gold, college ring the size of robin’s egg.

I don’t speak about this to make anyone feel bad for me. I share because the people who have been abused as children for whatever reason need to talk about their past to take away the bad stigma, to release us from the blame we had often placed upon ourselves.

In my many years as a Life Coach, I have discovered that most of us have a story, a terrifying story that we have never shared, one that not only embarrasses us but one that is locked so far in our subconscious mind that we feel it may cause a myriad of other bad moments to flow out if we ever dare open that door. I have heard those stories and wept with my clients. I didn’t weep because I was sad at the event itself. Most of the events were small compared to the grand abuse I’ve seen. I cried because of the impact and the fear they kept inside for so many years.

As I see now, releasing pain through speaking candidly about it is better than holding it in—always.

 

When I decided to write my memoirs, it began as an exercise to release the past. Now, I just want to share the story, as I know those who have read it were deeply touched and healed from many deep scars. (It’s free this week on Kindle, if you are a member of Kindle Unlimited.)

 

Also, If you sense you need to talk to someone for any of the above issues (either as a friend or the person having painful memories), give me a call. It always helps to release your pain and get another point of view as part of the healing process. Call today: 954-253-6493!

__________________

Also, join me on my new YouTube Cooking Series: Angel Feast: Recipes for a New World: to see the first 7 cooking shows. Fast and easy, delicious to the root! That’s our motto!

 

 

GIVING AND RECEIVING IN LIFE IS OFTEN DIFFICULT. I have been giving from my heart about 2-3 hours a day for 7 years to create advice–spirit, mind and body for millions of readers. Recently, I have been led to ask people to give back as a way for me to learn how to receive.

As a tribute to my belief that “prosperity is all around us, should we choose to receive,” I want to invite those of you who want to send an offering for the joy or advice you have received from Finding Authentic You Blog.

“We must give to receive, always. This is the Law of Reciprocity.”

If you would like to participate in giving to the gift of this blog: Please send all checks, money orders, or credit card requests to:

Bo Sebastian, c/o Finding Authentic You Enterprises,
117 Lake Emerald Drive #108
Oakland Park, FL 33309

Thank you for your gift!

__________

If you buy a copy of my book: FINDING AUTHENTIC YOU and send me the receipt, I will send you

A FREE HYPNOSIS MP3 TO HELP YOU DURING TIMES OF PAIN. SEND THE RECEIPT TO bosebastian5@gmail.com and I’ll send the Mp3 within the week, I promise.

Deciding on and living by your core values is a tenuous challenge. My many years of spiritual coaching and life coaching can help you with this. I have helped many people in this situation see light and overcome the darkness of the past. Give me a call: 954-253-6493. SKYPE sessions are available. Click Here for More Information.

[IF YOU HAVE ENJOYED THIS POST, PLEASE DO ME A FAVOR AND SHARE THIS WITH YOUR FRIENDS USING ONE OF YOUR FAVORITE SOCIAL MEDIA ICONS ON THE SIDE PANEL OR IN A POP UP MENU AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS PAGE! THANKS SO MUCH, BO.]

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493
(Sessions CAN BE DONE via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for more information on a personal session with Bo.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

You don’t get to this voice if reason or recognize it unless you spend time with yourself in silence, asking yourself important self-talk questions. This is like dating. You must get to know the voice of the Spirit by spending time in meditation and silence. This is the only I know to clearly download the power of wisdom and recognize the voice—IN TIMES OF TRAUMA—that is always directing YOU into safety!

____________________

 

Sign up for our mailing list BELOW. (You need to only do this once!) You’ll be privy to the latest and greatest ways to help yourself eat, exercise, meditate, and express your authentic life in ways you never thought possible. I promise not to flood you with ads or sell your name to advertisers. This is a personal e-mail server, which I use only to make big announcements. Thanks for signing up in advance.

GET A FREE E-BOOK ON SELF-HELP FOR SIGNING UP!

Look for MY LATEST BOOK: “Your New Story, Your New Life” with a pathway to CLEAR (C-larity, L-ove, E-nthusiasm A-nd R-elationship-Ready) on my Website or on Amazon. Thanks!

GO TO AMAZON

 

 

 

 

 

Please follow and like us:
0

Breaking Free from the Shackles of the Past #fear #shineyourlight #spirituality #lovewins

The picture of the past can be a dark and unyielding temptation too often revisited. This very place holds yours worst enemies and contains a slow-killing poison that will eventually cause you to be addicted to dying slowly.

I found a story on Psychology Forum that completely exemplifies this obscure part of the mind that holds this pain:

“My mind feels like a huge encyclopedia of past hurts and wrongs, and I can quickly look up various incidents and emotions to remind myself of each failure. I have also never truly gotten over anything – just thinking about events in the past that were hurtful can cripple me with depression. I’ve never gotten over any failed relationships, and I hold grudges until the bitter end.”

This writer talks of how paralyzing PTSD and living in the past can be in his exposé about the past.

Continue reading below.

________________________________

Sign up for our mailing list BELOW. (You need to only do this once!) You’ll be privy to the latest and greatest ways to help yourself eat, exercise, meditate, and express your authentic life in ways you never thought possible. I promise not to flood you with ads or sell your name to advertisers. This is a personal e-mail server, which I use only to make big announcements. Thanks for signing up in advance.

GET A FREE E-BOOK ON MEDITATION FOR SIGNING UP!

Also, check out one of my latest books:

(This week featuring: “Your New Story, Your New Life” The Metaphysical Mind.)

GO TO AMAZON

_____________________________________

Continued from above:

From Psychology Today I read another memoir about depression caused by living in the past; this one, however, sheds more light on what we must do to break the cycle:

“I remember one morning getting up at dawn. There was such a sense of possibility. You know, that feeling. And I… remember thinking to myself: So this is the beginning of happiness, this is where it starts. And of course there will always be more…It never occurred to me it wasn’t the beginning. It was happiness itself. It was the moment, right then… Not the past.”

I woke up this morning realizing how free I feel as a result of breaking a tie to the past that I hadn’t fully understood was causing moments of sadness. I had been working for a man who—for all intense and purposes—brought me back to my past every time I spoke with him. At first, he drew me in as a friend, then asked me to work for him, and slowly began a descent into control and narcissistic behavior.

His words and actions made me realize that, in my mind, I was still a child dealing with a narcissistic father.

The problem with scenarios from the past affecting the present is that we don’t rightly see what’s going on until it slaps us in the face with something fierce and ugly. When we begin to review the regression and see where we have slipped into old behavior is finally the point of salvation.

A depressed individual is rarely able to get this much clarity. Only after many years of therapy am I able to realize that this is one of the last relationships I had to heal to move forward. I’ll explain in greater depth below.

As I move forward in preparing to get married, I have spent much time looking at all of the romantic relationships I have been in my life—the mistakes I had made, the problems I could have avoided, and the ways I’ve grown as a result of experiencing each relationship.

What I didn’t realize was that underneath all of the bad relationships was a thread that had been carefully woven by my misconception of what love was. This was as a result of the narcissistic behavior of my father and my mother leaving our home when I was 7 years old. This kind of rough beginning can distort any person’s idea of what true love looks like. A childhood like mine can often lead people to dating archetypes that look secure (muscular, big men, successful and intelligent people, overly secure people, and overtly narcissistic people) rather than real people with real heart.

In this moment, my relationship needs are to feel secure, monogamous, and tightly-knit (cuddling, enjoying life together, and laughing a lot). I know that I have picked a partner with some of the same past that I have, so we deeply respect each other and have one another’s backs. I feel secure and that he is not remotely a picture of anything in my past. Of course, this is my hope. Only time will tell.

However, what has happened in the realizing that David is the right man for me is that I have had to see what was the “wrong man.” Interestingly enough, every person in my past scenario had threads of the negative relationship with my father. So, it would make sense that the last hurdle to living in the present love I have would be to reject any more abuse from narcissistic people (these are people who can’t see past their own perception of life to have any empathy for others).

Getting over your past is a fragile and difficult place to get to. I know I can help you with this, if a coach or a hypnotherapist is what you need. I have helped many people in this situation see light and overcome the darkness of the past. Give me a call: 954-253-6493. SKYPE sessions are available.

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493
(Sessions CAN BE DONE via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books:

 

Please follow and like us:
0

Learned Helplessness #psychology #behaviormodification #spirituality #bodyandmind

If a tiger is put in a cage that is only large enough for it to walk in small circles, for two years, even if he gets put into a huge environment, the tiger is likely to only walk in those same small circles, thereafter. This behavior is called “learned helplessness.”

From Wikipedia: Learned helplessness is behavior typical of an organism (human or animal) that has endured repeated painful or otherwise adverse stimuli, which it was unable to escape or avoid. After such experience, the organism often fails to learn to escape in new situations where such behavior would be effective.

We can see this behavior in humans who have suffered traumatic events as children that seem to give up trying when faced with even the greatest of chances to better themselves. They self-sabotage and commit to less because their minds won’t let them outside of the old paradigm of confinement.

With this being said, how do we change the state of avoidance and belief from a situation that may have caused learned helplessness in our own lives?

I had a recent event in my own life that brought about a feeling of wanting to give up and not try. The event triggered the worst parts of my ego. It brought up insecurity, the need to be perfect to get love, and also pushed me into a dark and scary place.

I clearly needed to get help quickly, otherwise, I would have sunk even deeper into a depression, I’m sure. This, to me, was clearly a PTSD event that brought back some serious, old feelings of insecurity.

I was told that I did something wrong, when I didn’t believe I had. This was one person’s perception, but it was someone important to me. Nonetheless, I let his judgment of a situation cloud my entire mind, until I was curled up in my bed, holding my heart and asking for help from God.

In my quiet, I heard a kind voice say to me, “I have already helped you. I have given you the keys to the kingdom, to your creative mind. I have given you back the power that was stolen from you. USE IT!”

I remembered the scripture in the Bible where Jesus said, “Physician, heal yourself!” And I actually understood it was up to me to change my helplessness into power.

I brought myself back to the time when I was hiding in the closet as a child, one of the few places as a young kid that I felt safe. I remembered that little boy who experienced helplessness and the feeling of being unloved. Those exact feelings as a child mirrored what I felt in that moment. What I faced as an adult was nothing compared to the abuse of my childhood, but nonetheless, I had the same feelings of wanting to give up and quit. No matter how hard I tried, I felt unloved and wrong in the current situation. So, instead of facing my life, I hid in my closet. In this case, it was under my covers in my bed.

My prayer was simple, but effective, when I got the courage to finally pray it:

“I know that God is all in all; in the immensity of the universe and in the smallest memories of my past. The energy of love and creativity exists in God and has been passed to me as a child of the Creator. I firmly accept this challenge to be the man God created me to be. I reject the premise of old that would say that I am less than, not good enough, or my light is not bright enough for the world. I am all that God has made me and much more than I can imagine.

“What would I be without this old, negative thought that I am “not enough?” Would I be more powerful, unlimited in my resource, and flow in divine prosperity? Indeed, I would. So, I lift my eyes unto the source of all good and trust that I c0-abide as love, in love, and am always expressing as love. This I believe to be true about my current situation, as I face it as an adult, not as a hurt, young child.”

****

This year, if you desire to commit to a change for a New Year’s Resolution, do it with your MIND first. Remember, as in the title of my new book coming out just in time to help you with this (in March)… lol… that all change happens in your mind, first. You must change your Old Story, to make a consistent and long lasting change in Your Life.cropped:Bo's book cover_USA Version_Compressed

Please be looking for “YOUR NEW STORY, YOUR NEW LIFE, Unlock Your Seven Spiritual Discoveries” in bookstores and in online bookstores in May or June of 2016!

***

Are you in need of Life or Spiritual Coaching? I’ve been a life coach and clinical hypnotherapist and minister of New Thought for 25 years. I do my sessions online, so you can even have your session in bed, so that you can go directly to sleep during the hypnosis session. You must have a laptop or a notebook to do these sessions, either on Skype or Facetime. You can give me a call at 954-253-6493. My fee is $95 for an hour.

You can find all of my Books by Category at http://www.bosebastian.com/new-page/ All of these books have been birthed from my own spiritual growth. I guarantee you’ll enjoy how each will help you maintain a positive mind, body, and spirit. Also, if you click on the Amazon site, you’ll see all of my 15 book— Cookbooks, Novels, Self-Help Books, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…cropped-cropped-6009Color1001.jpg

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

 

 

 

Please follow and like us:
0
Loading...
X

Enjoy this blog? Please spread the word :)