Tag: Religion and Spirituality

On a Queer Day, You Can See Forever!

I have to tell you, I hate the word queer. I love gay people, but hate the word.

The dictionary’s definition is: chiefly odd, strange, and a derogatory name for homosexual. What gay person wants to be called queer? I think this all started with that television show, “Queer as Folk,” which was about as realistic about gay lifestyle as me living in my backyard in a tent and calling it roughing it.

Obviously, if you’ve lived as long as I have, you know that the title of this blog is a play on the words of the song, “On a Clear Day.” Today things are getting a bit clearer for me.

I had shared that I have been in a bit of a fog since my break-up 3 weeks ago. We all know that happens. I don’t want to believe I am not susceptible to anything that my clients wouldn’t be. But the truth is I have one clear advantage. I get to learn from all of my dear ones. And as I learn, I take my knowledge to the high ground where I try to be an objective, compassionate observer of my life.

These past few weeks I have seen a physical, human man needing time to recover emotionally and physically. So, I have done just that. It hasn’t been pleasant sometime. But I have tried my best to tell the people around me what is going on and let them in on the recovery process. It truly does take a village.

For instance, when I was on my way home for Knoxville, and I knew Steve had moved out his furniture, I asked a couple friends to be there when I returned. I knew I would need support and help to get the home back to being solely mine. I don’t regret that decision in the least. In fact, I think it has been one of the strongest decisions I’ve made in a long time.

What I have noticed now as different than from what I used to do when I was unhappy is that now I let people in. Also, I take time to be quiet and let the feelings that I need to process arise from within and simply feel them. You can’t deal with anything you don’t feel and experience.

In times past, I would do everything I could to make the feelings go away. In fact, a lot of people say, the best way to get rid of bad feelings from a break-up is to go out and get laid. I’m very happy to say that I haven’t even thought about that—can’t think about that. My emotions are so tied to sensuality and intimacy, that I don’t even think I could perform without a close bond with my mate.

There was a time that I would think that was an impossibility. But today, I’m actually at that point. I know it has a lot to do with age and a lack of testosterone coursing through my body. Nonetheless, my physicality has given me a tremendous perspective on healing and working through relationship issues.

The other property that I didn’t have before was The Manual… Yes, the manual I speak of is the book: “Attached.” If it were not for the daily reading from it, I think I could not have made heads or tails of what has happened in the last year or the last 4 years of my life in anxious, avoidant, and secure relationships. Right now, because of the book, because of quiet time, and because of God, I finally think I have a clue on what makes for a good relationship.

I am now bound and determined to seek one out—in due time.

 

 

* * *

Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to Quit Smoking, Lose Weight with the new Lap Band-Hypnosis, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com.

I am trying to spread the word about my blog and I need your help. Please let your friends know it exists, if it gives you hope and blesses you each day. Your connection to me blesses me in everyway possible. And I would be greatly pleased for you to share anything that you read by clicking the share button in Facebook.com/bo.sebastian, or add it to your Twitter at BoSebastian; or LinkedIN at Bosebastian5@gmail.com; or find this blog home at www.FindingAuthenticYou.com. Any of my books can be found on Amazon or Barnes and Nobel, just by typing my name in the search header.

 

Please follow and like us:
0

The Birth of Something Wonderful

The Birth of Something Wonderful

Today is traditionally the celebration of the birth of Jesus. I love that the world finds a way to do something completely together, even if some of us are calling it Kwanza and Chanukah. There is still a celebratory feeling moving throughout most lands. This oneness is a great feeling in consciousness because most of us are considering this day or these days a time of great distinction for peace and love and giving. As this is so, I believe it provides us all with a vision of what the world might look like if we had this truth in our heart for the entire year.

This birth that we celebrate can be a birth with in all of us—a new birth of something wonderful, new and exciting. We can all manifest more abundance, more love, more truth, more giving, treat ourselves to more receiving, and, in general, practice the art of staying inside our homes and enjoying our loved ones.

I think about the normal function of a day such as Christmas. The streets are bare. The stores are closed. Everyone is with the people we call family, whether it is extended family or just close friends. But we all take time to close down the world and be with the people we love. This is so important on a daily basis.I had a couple that was coming in for some coaching in their marriage. We decided that the main thing that was missing in their marriage was “daily” communication. They spoke on weekends, but for some reason the husband felt like the week was for making money and supporting the family. So, he got up on weekdays, barely communicated, went to work, came home, and fell asleep without saying a word to his wife. Then on the weekends would expect his wife to be completely present after he ignored her all week.

We are a society of people who believe in principals much like that family. We let our children play computer games all day and night, while we are workaholics, and then expect families to function on the weekends or on vacations as if they have been communicating their feelings all the time. Secure love and relationship is very much dependent upon the need to actually relate daily.

Dependency isn’t a bad thing when you are inter-dependent and securely dependent, relating to each other with the intent to truly know each other and thrive from the knowing.

So, let us delight in the beautiful gift we are given today of the template of the grand life of peace among men. We can feel it in our finger and toes. We can breathe it in the air. We sense it as the phone rings and one more person we haven’t spoken to for a while bids us a warm hello.

Make this day a day to remember in our hearts. Bring it forward more often than just December 25th. Call it up on August 3rd and May 25th. Buy someone you love a gift on a day that doesn’t matter. Call a friend and tell him/her that you love the presence they to your life—just because. Make peace be your daily prayer. Hold it in your heart for the entire world.

* * *

Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to Quit Smoking, Lose Weight with the new Lap Band-Hypnosis, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com.I am trying to spread the word about my blog and I need your help. Please let your friends know it exists, if it gives you hope and blesses you each day. Your connection to me blesses me in everyway possible. And I would be greatly pleased for you to share anything that you read by clicking the share button in Facebook.com/bo.sebastian, or add it to your Twitter at BoSebastian; or LinkedIN at Bosebastian5@gmail.com; or find this blog home at www.FindingAuthenticYou.com. Any of my books can be found on Amazon, just by typing my name in the header.

FRIENDS: CLICK ON THE <<MORE>> BUTTON TO VOTE, LIKE, COMMENT OR SHARE… Thanks, Bo.

Please follow and like us:
0

How Late Is Late?

How Late Is Late?

I am one of those guys who arrives either on time or a little early. For most of my friends who run late, it’s a little annoying. Sometimes I get to a party and the host is still at the grocery store. I’m thinking, really! Your invitation said 7 p.m. for dinner, and I’m starving. Where are the appetizers?

The host will come rushing in at five minutes after seven, not showered, start throwing things at me to prepare. And I, of course, do what I can to help. But really, is this the way we want to conduct ourselves?

When I’m teaching a yoga class and someone comes in during a meditation, and he or she snaps a mat against the floor and acts as if no one else is there, I wonder how narcissistic can a person be. I truly don’t mind if people come in during class, if they are considerate of other people’s space and energy. But this noisy crap makes me want to scream.

I’m sitting here waiting for a client right now who said that she plumb forgot she had an appointment today, and that she would be right over. Well, it has been well over 25 minutes and still no client is sitting in my chair. I had to call my next client and tell her to expect me to be later, even though I will try to only give the late client 35 minutes out of the hour. Sometimes it’s just hard to get a hypnosis session in that quickly.

If you are someone who is habitually late for things, think of the disrespect that you are causing others. Life is not just about you. If you have a problem in this area, work on it. There are plenty of psychological article written about late people that discuss that it may be hiding other issues such as depression, ADD, ADHD, and substance abuse.

The website: www.wikihow.com/Stop-Running-Late discusses 11 steps on how to overcome lateness. I like the ideas. They seem to be simple and an easy challenge for someone with chronic lateness.

 

Please follow and like us:
0
Loading...
X

Enjoy this blog? Please spread the word :)