Tag: Shopping

Pushing at the Weight Gain

Pushing at the Weight Gain

So, if you have been following the story: I’ve been trying to gain 10 pounds to help with finding a true compassionate perspective with my weight-challenged clients. After I gain them, I’m going to go on a diet and try to take them off. Well, I have been being bad all over the place.

Yesterday for dinner I ate meatballs, pasta, 2 pieces of chicken with the skin. Then went to a party and had chocolate cupcakes, potato chips, 3 beers with carbs and I didn’t exercise yesterday. I actually sat down at work all day.

What were the results? I lost 3 pounds.

What?????

Now that just doesn’t make sense at all. If this works, I’m going to make a mint on a new “Eat whatever you want diet and still lose.”

The only thing I can think of is that I laughed my ass off two nights in a row and have been extremely happy about everything I was eating. I have been told that if you really enjoy everything that you eat and drink that it assimilates to your body 100% better. I do know that laughing and carrying on does take a lot of energy, especially with 5 girls who don’t know the meaning of boundaries on game night.

So, today, I’m going to try again at eating too much. We’ll see what happens. I tell you, I’m miserable digestively. I don’t know how long I can do this. I don’t know how anyone can eat too much, honestly. It is just simply uncomfortable.

 

 

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What Follows Truth?

What Follows Truth

I have had many of my hero-clients face their demons these past few weeks only to find that what follows is deep-seated grief—grief that they never got to express all the years they held back their important truths that would have liberated them and all the people around them.

Are tears from grief a necessary tool for healing? Absolutely. I once had a very precious nurse friend tell me that tears are like the blood that rushes to the surface of our skin to cleanse a wound when we cut ourselves. We bleed until the wound is clean and ready to heal. We cry until our souls are cleansed and ready to heal.

Necessary? Damn right.

There is no circumventing the steps of healing. You have a cancer that needs to be cut away. You go to the surgeon, and with precision, it is cut away. Then you bleed. Then you rest and heal. No one gets around the circumstance unless God intervenes with a miracle.

After that, no one really knows what’s going to happen with the people around you. But you do know one thing for sure: YOU ARE LIVING YOUR LIFE IN AUTHENTICITY! And you can trade nothing for that feeling of peace.

It took maybe fifteen years for my father to accept me as a gay man. It took five for my mother. My sisters were a lot more compassionate. My brother still doesn’t get it. But for me, I wouldn’t go back into the closet for anything. I’m free and healed.

Do my scars show? Sometimes.

They show when I get around a super religious bible-thumping person who believes I’m going to hell because I’m gay. I can feel my entire body wanting to retreat from their presence. When a child is abused or hurt or commits suicide because he/she is gay, I bleed inside.

But I know those scars are perfectly carved into my heart by God. They help me create safe boundaries and bring forth a sense of divine compassion that may help others in the future. After all, do we really want to go through our pain for nothing? I hope not.

So, truth. Is it worth it? You tell me.

 

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Not Everything Old Needs to Be Replaced

Not Everything Old Needs to be Replaced

Something Old Beats Something New.

I have this shower that I thought I was going to replace ever since I moved into my house. I have never liked it. Mold seemed to grow from every corner always. When I would try to deal with the mold with bleach and new caulking, the mold would grow back as fast as I would caulk it like savage roaches under a carpet with cake crumbs.

Alas, my savior Steve, my handyman and partner, moves in and says: “I can fix that.”

I’m thinking, right.. I’ve tried to do that about 10 times, which is clear by the ten inches of caulk that looks like a child has shoved into each corner playing with finger paints.

A little aside: Steve watches 2 hours of home and garden channel every day.

Steve starts talking about drying the shower, cutting away the old, really bad job the last person did (I never told him it was me), and beading the caulking and getting the kind of caulking that doesn’t mold. Suddenly, I’m thinking, this man may be on to something I never thought of.

Today, I took a shower in what looks like a brand new model shower. I can’t believe how beautiful it looks. He doesn’t even know how great of a job he is capable of doing, even though I’ve doted and gooed. It looks as professional as if it were brand new. I’m amazed, because I have stood in it for 4 years griping.

He’s my hero today. I’m thankful for old things being restored. And also for my old mind needing a fixin’. Not everything has be replaced to beautiful again.

That’s a good lesson for my feeble mind.

 

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