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The Morning After #morningafterpill #mom

When I was in high school, two popular young ladies got pregnant at 15 and 16 years old. I remember how ostracized they became. In those days, most parents had a protocol: you hide for a while, give birth, put the child up for adoption, then go back to your life without speaking a word about it. Most of all: You become a born-again virgin, not even looking at men until you finish high school. Both of these girls were not popular when they came back to school.

I’m not sure what high school today looks like, but as a viewer of the popular show “Mom,” children have more options, and parents tend to help their children raise their babies. But the picture about sex is: Most high school kids are having it. So, we better teach them ways to prevent pregnancy or home school them until they are 18 years old. I know of a few teenagers who are very involved in their church and joined a celibacy club. But, as I have been a teacher of these same 15-16 year olds, I know the truth about their lives. I was the one they confessed to, because the obvious parents were way too judgmental to be a compassionate voice of reason. Very few teenagers, if any, truly stay celibate once they meet that first love.

Love and sexuality are more like trying to eat one delicious sweet from the cookie jar, and then close it for the night. Most adults go back for more and more. Let’s face it, these days, at 15, we are more adult than we want to admit. I remember when I was 15 years old. Though it was completely taboo, I had a couple times. My four sisters were all dipping into the cookie jar as well throughout high school and their late teens. I guess, we weren’t the prudes. But, I think we all suffered for it.

I’ve discussed Attachment Theory in detail (refer to other blogs about this subject if you’re new to the blog). Because my mom left my dad when I was in fourth grade, and I didn’t see her again until 10th, my attachment became anxious—very anxious. I believe all of my family had a rather anxious attachment as a result. So, to keep the person we were interested in close, we thought sex was necessary. This anxious attachment superseded all of anyone’s religious beliefs. Your action is out of fear, not a desire to be moral or godly.

I believe, if you look at childhood pregnancy, you would probably find that most of these young adults have had trauma resulting in anxious attachment. If a young girl is anxiously attached, she will probably acquiesce to fear over any religious belief out of the deep need to be loved and held. So, having sex would be more about the man having better morals than the girl and not pushing sex on her. We all know, though, that, even with the best young man, he is probably dreaming night and day of having sex, so expecting him to act wisely is ludicrous.

The morning after pill was designed to help those who have unprotected sex, and then realize they have made a mistake, afterwards. The marketing slogan is even: “Accidents do happen!”

Yes, we tripped and fell into coitus. Now, I need a band-aid.

What exactly does this pill do?

Levonorgestral is used in two 12-hour dosages or one stronger dosage. It’s not to be mistaken for Abortifacient, which was called the “abortion pill” when it first came out. The Day After Pill is not a prescription and can only be used for 3 days after unprotected sex. It does not kill HIV or any other sexually contracted disease. It simply causes a fertilized egg to become unfertile by manipulating estrogen and progestin, which releases the egg from the body during menstruation, from what I gleaned on the Internet.

If you have children in high school, especially girls, do you believe you should provide the proper talk, provide condoms, birth control pills, and the day after pill for them, incase of Emergency Sex?

Being a parent is hard at any time. But, loving a teenager can be difficult, when they suddenly decide they are making the harder decisions in their lives on their own with the little morals you were able to help them digest when you have been less than a role model. You can chain them to the bedroom, cut them off financially, or give them the tools to survive through their harder decisions. I hate to say it, but after all this research, I guess I’m going to be for giving the kids the pill. But, I’d also really have a heart-to-heart talks about what adding sexuality to a relationship does to your soul and mind at a young age. Being honest is the most important aspect of raising a child in a place where all of them have Internet on their phones.

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