The Question No One Wants to Answer? #overcominganxiety #loveismydecision #spiritualadvice #psychology

Only one question exists that can change your happy, enriched heart to a clumsy, anxious one: “Why am I not good enough… to find a loving relationship, to find a satisfying job, to get rich, to have nice friends, to live in a beautiful home?” You name the outcome you don’t have. The question will always be the same.

I have asked myself this question thousands of times. When someone breaks up with me, when I don’t get the part, when I don’t make enough money to support my life, when a friend goes awry, or when family matters blow up in my face, the question is always the same. Why am I not Joe down the street who seems to have everything: the beautiful home, the perfect marriage, the swimming pool in the backyard, the job he loves to go to everyday, and the family that seems to be arriving with gifts every time I look out of the window? Why is he so blessed and, me… why am I not good enough, smart enough, fortunate enough to have all that he has?

I had spent most of my life chasing rainbows. I received a better degree. I wrote the novel everyone told me to write, because it would make me a million bucks. I sought out the popular friends. I hung with the pretty people. I neglected anyone in my family with problems. I basically thought that the way to happiness was to have things, be prettier, socialize with the elite, and avoid all the things that cause me anxiety.

What was the outcome? More anxiety than I could imagine.

When you enter into this kind of paradigm, you realize that life never provides enough. Despite the beautiful things surrounding you, you strive to make more, work more, and, yet, you have less time for the people who really love you. Things can’t measure happiness. We all know that in our heart of hearts, but we still keep striving toward satisfying that blessed ego.

Trust me, I have to remind myself daily that the world was created and is supported by Love and Source. I am one in and as that Source. I already have within me everything I need for happiness. In fact, no one, no thing, no job can fulfill that part of my heart that seems empty, because that part is not empty at all. My ego only perceives that it’s empty, which makes me anxious to fill it. I was never empty. I have never been void of all the love I need to be content and secure.

I used to envy the monks who would sit for days with nothing but the clothes on their backs and meditate in total bliss. What am I missing, I would think? My particular thorn in the flesh was that I thought that a fulfilling relationship would satisfy my heart and release me from my pain. Well, as long as I had someone loving to tend to, dote on me, and socialize with, yes, I was content. But when relationship ultimately has its problems, then suddenly, you realize that happiness is not relationship. This is a cold, hard fact. But, I faced one relationship’s demise after another then finally I understand. No one person can add or subtract from the perfect love that is already mine and always has been mine.

I recently dealt with a break-up. Surprisingly, I didn’t cry one tear. In fact, besides some of the angry and hurtful moments, my thoughts were more eschewed toward this: What am I missing here? What can I bring to this moment to make room for love to express through me? What is the gift this moment can bring?

When I got honest with myself, I realized that anger only made me not think about my own hurt and disappointment. These feelings I had to face realistically. As I faced them and changed my hurt into micro-intentions (praying for the opposite of my painful feeling for someone in need), I realized that love never stopped.

I looked around me and noticed all of the people that Love had attracted to my life. Smiling knowingly, I realized that I am good enough, not because I have a degree or stay in shape or have any material thing. I am good enough because I am one with the power that created the universe. How can I want anything more than that?

When you understand this, no matter what your circumstance, you OWN THE ROOM!

Picture of Learning Alone

Today’s featured book is “Learning Alone.” It’s a book birthed from my own spiritual growth in the knowledge that nothing is gained in relationship unless you have the power of self-love.  Also, if you click on the Amazon site, you’ll see all of my 15 book— Cookbooks, Novels,  Self-Help Books, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

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A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian 

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)


If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and “being gay” defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]





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