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The Wind Song Stays on My Mind

Like a tightly knitted sweater, my lady friend crossed her arms, curling her hands around herself. She knelt down by the grave and kissed the stone. I saw the wind brush her hair so softly that individual strands cascaded across her teary face. One last look… One last touch… Could she ever get back the moments that were stolen away by one drunk driver?

Her heart wasn’t bitter. She loved God. She believed every thing happens for a reason. Yet, there were whispers of resentment floating upward and inward with her prayers. You could hear it in the shivering wind song lilting through the pines.

I remember the cold day in winter as if it were yesterday. My friend grieved over the loss of her seventeen year old son. No one could comfort her. “A mother is not supposed to outlive her child,” she muttered.

My family and friends stayed at arms length, but not too close to give her space. We all wanted to lift her into joy. On a normal day, she had more vivacious love and caring in her heart than most people.

On that distant day from my past, I asked myself if I would live to see thirty. I can’t tell you why. I just felt it in my soul.

You wonder how these thoughts begin. This began with a death—a tragic death. Many things in my life began when death sank deeply into my bones—close enough to touch, near enough to taste. I reassessed life in that moment. What was the nature of my existence, and how did I plan to make the best of every moment from that point on?

Why is the power death so life changing? If you are sane and intelligent, you have to know that every relationship has an end. We either separate by reason or by death. Life, by nature, is the opposite of its cohort—death. There is inevitability in life. An end will happen. It will happen to you at some point, we just don’t know when.

The existential reality of life is such that without life, there would be no death. So, the two opposite ends of the spectrum come hand in hand. Is it that we just don’t want to recognize death, until our ultimate demise stares us in the face?

When that happens, does something magically transform us and make us into something we never thought possible?

I believe this is so. Death has changed me many times. Each time, I grow a little deeper, wiser, and trust in my gut a bit more. But mostly, I learn to stop fretting over the miniscule parts of life and begin living the greater parts.

However, if you don’t understand what you life’s purpose is, death brings about a completely different challenge, especially if you are an Atheist or Agnostic. If you don’t believe there is a hereafter, than the only choice to believe is that you will no longer exist in any form. What could be more disparaging than that?

But with a life’s purpose and faith in an afterlife, at least, you can trust that something, somewhere, has a handle on the longevity of your life and your purpose here on earth.

The goal would be to integrate your own beliefs and life into your spiritual purpose. When you do that, your fear subsides. You realize that you will be here as long as it takes to achieve your life’s goal. Then, perhaps, if you believe in reincarnation, you might believe that on the other side of this life, there may be another life to try again.

I don’t have answers. I have questions. If you haven’t asked yourself these questions, you might consider doing so. If and when you do, you will encounter each precious moment with care and the attention it deserves.

The Now will become your inevitable home.

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Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com.

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