Trouble Receiving Love? #weightloss #dieting #receivinglove #givinglove #selfacceptance

A great many people have no problem spending their entire lives giving every last bit of their love to their families, charities, and their friends. But, those same people usually have trouble receiving love, as well. As it turns out, to receive love with an open heart, you must believe that you deserve love. This can become a huge issue with people who have self-esteem issues.

For a few years, I co-facilitated a support group of men and women who had either had bariatric surgery, lap band surgery, or were contemplating one of the two. The group met twice a week to discuss the issues of weight loss. However, what we usually ended up talking about was self-esteem. Almost everyone in the group was givers, but had trouble receiving love and help. The members gave every last ounce of their energy to every one else in their lives (at work, at home, and even to charities) to gain self-worth and ended up having no strength to take care of themselves.

This problem was in epidemic proportions among the obese. What we often discovered in our discussions is that the people struggling with weight issues would spend much of their energy avoiding themselves, because they didn’t want to look at their bodies, their health, or their lack of self-worth. They were afraid to see the ugly truth, because they thought their was no answer to the problem. So, in the end, they only way they rewarded themselves was with food. It was a simple fix for each of them, sometimes resulting in gaining back one hundred pounds in just a month. The ping pong effect in the obese community happens to almost every one of the members.

Data from the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey:

• More than 2 in 3 adults are considered to be overweight or obese.

• More than 1 in 3 adults are considered to be obese.

• More than 1 in 20 adults are considered to have extreme obesity.

• About one-third of children and adolescents ages 6 to 19 are considered to be overweight or obese.

• More than 1 in 6 children and adolescents ages 6 to 19 are considered to be obese.

As you can see, the problem keeps growing. Honestly, as a life coach and clinical hypnotherapist, I see that the issues are really not with food at all. They are mostly with self-esteem. So, if you have trouble dieting and losing that extra weight, don’t be afraid to take a good, hard look at your life’s consistent behaviors and begin modifying them. As for the people in the over-eaters group, most of them realized that they had to stop doing for everyone in their lives to garner self-esteem and begin to look for ways to reward themselves with health and self-love.

This often meant that the people who had been using them for their big hearts retreated from their lives, making room for more self-love. Most often, these exiting members were family, waiting to leach every last ounce of energy from the good hearts of the men and women with weight problems. Sometimes taking care of yourself means letting go of the people who suck the energy out of your life. This can be a difficult move. I highly recommend you find a professional to discuss your issues. A good coach will walk you through the hard challenges of facing your problems and continue to bolster your self-esteem while you makes healthy changes.

Love is always waiting to take your hand and lead you into a place of truth. You see; you are made of love. The very foundation of who you are is love. So, sometimes, when you don’t believe you deserve love (which is not true, no matter who you are or what you’ve done), you build a wall around love that often looks like obesity. Don’t be surprised when you lose that weight that you must also learn to open your heart to the love that has been their since the conception of your beautiful self!

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What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others? If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

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Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information. Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE. Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on

The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

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