What Follows Truth?
December 21, 2012
What Follows Truth
I have had many of my hero-clients face their demons these past few weeks only to find that what follows is deep-seated grief—grief that they never got to express all the years they held back their important truths that would have liberated them and all the people around them.
Are tears from grief a necessary tool for healing? Absolutely. I once had a very precious nurse friend tell me that tears are like the blood that rushes to the surface of our skin to cleanse a wound when we cut ourselves. We bleed until the wound is clean and ready to heal. We cry until our souls are cleansed and ready to heal.
Necessary? Damn right.
There is no circumventing the steps of healing. You have a cancer that needs to be cut away. You go to the surgeon, and with precision, it is cut away. Then you bleed. Then you rest and heal. No one gets around the circumstance unless God intervenes with a miracle.
After that, no one really knows what’s going to happen with the people around you. But you do know one thing for sure: YOU ARE LIVING YOUR LIFE IN AUTHENTICITY! And you can trade nothing for that feeling of peace.
It took maybe fifteen years for my father to accept me as a gay man. It took five for my mother. My sisters were a lot more compassionate. My brother still doesn’t get it. But for me, I wouldn’t go back into the closet for anything. I’m free and healed.
Do my scars show? Sometimes.
They show when I get around a super religious bible-thumping person who believes I’m going to hell because I’m gay. I can feel my entire body wanting to retreat from their presence. When a child is abused or hurt or commits suicide because he/she is gay, I bleed inside.
But I know those scars are perfectly carved into my heart by God. They help me create safe boundaries and bring forth a sense of divine compassion that may help others in the future. After all, do we really want to go through our pain for nothing? I hope not.
So, truth. Is it worth it? You tell me.