When a Prospect Date Says, “I’m a Mess or Unavailable!” #walkaway
March 20, 2014
In every book I’ve ever written about relationship and dealing with the harsh truth of what prospective dates tell you, I have always said, “Believe what you hear and run when a person reveals the hard truth about his life!” This being said, how hard is it to walk away when you bear the heavy burden of an anxious attachment style? In other words, when you believe you are a fixer, and your sole purpose in life is to hold on to what doesn’t want to be captured, is it even possible for you to walk away?
If you put yourself in a situation where you are dating the unavailable, you basically set yourself up for failure and hurt. Sometimes, the soul goes where it needs to. We learn the hardest lessons when we let our bodies and our attachments draw us to our next steps in life. But, if you’re willing to sacrifice some hurt for a hard lesson, then go for it. You will probably find the most passionate lover, because he or she will always be looking at you as forbidden fruit. You will always see the passion as some move toward a loving relationship.
Trust me on this one, unless you see action—real movement—toward the person changing his/her old situation (marriage, stale commitment, children holding parent captive because of addiction), you will never have a real relationship. You would be better off making a friend of this person and wait until the relationship he/she is in currently falls by the way side. Then, your new friend gets his act together. Do this, rather than going through the harrowing mess of being in the middle of a bad break-up. Usually, a person leaves one long-term relationship and the next relationship is an investigation into being single, at best. Rarely does a divorcée end up with the first person she dates.
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Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com. Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed.
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